1 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:52,084 Well, I wake up in the mornin' 2 00:00:52,167 --> 00:00:54,959 Each and everyday 3 00:00:55,042 --> 00:00:59,791 And I sit down at the table and I hear my daddy say 4 00:00:59,874 --> 00:01:02,333 Life is nothin' It's a nothin' 5 00:01:02,416 --> 00:01:04,874 Life is nothin' but a slap in the face 6 00:01:04,958 --> 00:01:07,333 Life is nothin' It's a nothin' 7 00:01:07,416 --> 00:01:10,082 Life is nothin' but a fat rat race 8 00:01:10,123 --> 00:01:14,582 Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah 9 00:01:14,623 --> 00:01:17,123 00:01:20,164 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah 11 00:01:20,206 --> 00:01:22,206 Every night I have a dream 12 00:01:22,331 --> 00:01:25,164 That you're takin' off your dress 13 00:01:25,206 --> 00:01:29,872 The only thing you're wearin' is a button on your chest 14 00:01:29,956 --> 00:01:32,371 And the button it says nothin' 15 00:01:32,413 --> 00:01:34,996 Life is nothin' but a slap in the face 16 00:01:35,080 --> 00:01:37,371 Life is nothin' It's a nothin' 17 00:01:37,455 --> 00:01:39,913 00:01:44,745 What is life 19 00:01:44,787 --> 00:01:47,370 What is life 20 00:01:47,454 --> 00:01:49,870 A rat race, a rat race 21 00:01:49,954 --> 00:01:54,703 What is life 22 00:01:54,828 --> 00:01:57,411 What is life 23 00:01:57,494 --> 00:01:59,994 A rat race, a rat race 24 00:02:00,119 --> 00:02:02,786 A rat race, a rat-rat race 25 00:02:02,869 --> 00:02:07,118 Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah 26 00:02:07,202 --> 00:02:10,202 Oh, yeah, yeah 27 00:02:10,285 --> 00:02:13,410 00:02:18,576 So all night long I just sing my stupid song 29 00:02:20,451 --> 00:02:22,617 Get a body out in the rat, in the race 30 00:02:22,701 --> 00:02:25,159 Get a body out in the rat, in the race 31 00:02:25,242 --> 00:02:27,784 Get a body out in the rat 32 00:02:31,991 --> 00:02:35,408 To the sound of the storm comin' strictly from the B-A-H-A M-E-N 33 00:02:47,824 --> 00:02:50,282 Life ain't nothin' but a big rat race 34 00:02:52,781 --> 00:02:54,989 Life ain't nothin' but a big rat race 35 00:02:55,073 --> 00:02:57,281 Life is nothin' It's a nothin' 36 00:02:57,364 --> 00:02:59,948 Life is nothin' but a slap in the face 37 00:02:59,989 --> 00:03:02,281 Life is nothin' It's a nothin' 38 00:03:02,406 --> 00:03:04,863 Life is nothin' but a fat rat race 39 00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:20,029 Hi. I'm checking out. 14322. 40 00:03:21,779 --> 00:03:23,904 - Mr. Schaffer? - That's me. 41 00:03:25,196 --> 00:03:28,195 00:03:32,778 - How was your luck last night? - I don't-- I didn't gamble. 43 00:03:32,861 --> 00:03:36,820 I was here for a friend's bachelor party. I guess he's the gambler. 44 00:03:39,319 --> 00:03:42,902 What's this $110? 45 00:03:43,027 --> 00:03:47,402 - Those are your in-room movies. - I didn't watch any movies. 46 00:03:47,485 --> 00:03:51,401 Okay, let's see. Afro Whores. 47 00:03:51,443 --> 00:03:53,609 00:03:56,984 You watched it-- let's see-- 11 times. 49 00:03:59,151 --> 00:04:03,942 Afro Whores, 2:30. Afro Whores, 4:00. Afro Whores, 5:30. 50 00:04:03,983 --> 00:04:07,442 It says in the morning you watched The Grinch for ten minutes... 51 00:04:07,483 --> 00:04:09,483 and then switched back over to Afro Whores. 52 00:04:09,567 --> 00:04:12,525 I swear I didn't watch it. I was at a bachelor party. 53 00:04:12,608 --> 00:04:14,816 There were 35 people there. You can ask any of them. 54 00:04:14,899 --> 00:04:17,732 - Take that off my record. - This is not a record, sir. 55 00:04:17,816 --> 00:04:22,274 - It's a delete. - How many times did you watch it? 56 00:04:22,357 --> 00:04:25,274 None! I didn't watch it. 57 00:04:25,357 --> 00:04:29,356 Are you sure? "Sizzling, three-way, backdoor action... 58 00:04:29,398 --> 00:04:31,773 featuring two sexy soul sisters--" 59 00:04:31,856 --> 00:04:34,648 I don't need to know what it's about. I did not watch it. 60 00:04:36,231 --> 00:04:39,439 00:04:44,064 Drove 500, and Chipper Jones struck out in that key situation. 62 00:04:44,147 --> 00:04:48,105 He's 0 for 5, lost three straight games. 63 00:04:48,189 --> 00:04:52,313 This month he has a one-game winning streak. 64 00:04:55,063 --> 00:05:00,021 Miss? Miss, can I have another one of these, please? 65 00:05:00,063 --> 00:05:04,020 Oh, sorry. I thought you were a woman. 66 00:05:04,103 --> 00:05:06,312 I am a woman. 67 00:05:08,187 --> 00:05:10,520 00:05:13,102 Yeah, you do. 69 00:05:14,186 --> 00:05:16,186 You know, I get that all the time. 70 00:05:16,311 --> 00:05:18,686 I guess I just have one of those faces. 71 00:05:18,769 --> 00:05:22,352 And now for our loser of the week. This week it's a no-brainer. 72 00:05:22,477 --> 00:05:24,935 Referee Owen Templeton made the biggest bonehead call... 73 00:05:25,018 --> 00:05:26,976 in the history of football. 74 00:05:27,018 --> 00:05:31,393 00:05:33,685 They were headed towards overtime. Everything was cool. 76 00:05:33,768 --> 00:05:35,850 They were about to toss the coin to see who would kick off. 77 00:05:35,934 --> 00:05:39,517 - Dallas, call it in the air. - Tails. 78 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:42,184 - That's heads. - That was tails. 79 00:05:42,267 --> 00:05:44,392 - No. It's-- - That was tails. 80 00:05:44,434 --> 00:05:47,766 No-- Wait! Hang on! It's-- Now, what did I say? 81 00:05:47,849 --> 00:05:49,808 - Tails! - It's tails. 82 00:05:49,891 --> 00:05:52,849 - It's heads. - What are you doin'? 83 00:05:54,933 --> 00:05:57,724 You saw-- 84 00:05:57,808 --> 00:06:00,557 Okay, little brother, just be cool. 85 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:02,557 Just be cool. 86 00:06:16,181 --> 00:06:19,556 Okay, this is it. See that glass? 87 00:06:19,639 --> 00:06:23,180 Walk across the lobby, slip on the glass, let gravity do the rest. 88 00:06:24,180 --> 00:06:26,138 00:06:30,221 True. You could break your neck. It's a risk I'm willing to take. 90 00:06:30,346 --> 00:06:33,263 Why don't "oo" do it? 91 00:06:33,346 --> 00:06:36,345 Because, Einstein, one of us needs to be the victim... 92 00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:39,262 and one of us needs to be the witness. 93 00:06:39,345 --> 00:06:42,720 I'm your own brother. I don't know what you're sayin'. 94 00:06:42,762 --> 00:06:44,887 How's your tongue? Let me see it. 95 00:06:48,386 --> 00:06:49,719 00:06:55,553 It looks good. It looks much better. 97 00:06:56,553 --> 00:06:57,968 Okay, here we go. 98 00:06:58,052 --> 00:07:02,427 We're on Candid Camera, so make it look good. 99 00:07:13,676 --> 00:07:16,134 Excuse me. I'm a lawyer. Gloria Allred. 100 00:07:16,217 --> 00:07:18,926 - What the hell happened here? - She slipped on that glass. 101 00:07:19,009 --> 00:07:23,341 Those arrogant jerks. They're gonna pay for this through the nose. 102 00:07:23,425 --> 00:07:26,091 00:07:28,133 This is going to be huge. 104 00:07:28,175 --> 00:07:30,091 She's an angel. 105 00:07:30,175 --> 00:07:33,632 What a cute little face. Would you look at those cheeks? 106 00:07:33,715 --> 00:07:36,465 - She's absolutely beautiful. - She has your eyes. 107 00:07:36,549 --> 00:07:38,715 It's the only picture I have of her. 108 00:07:38,799 --> 00:07:40,715 It's all worn out 'cause I'm always looking at it. 109 00:07:40,799 --> 00:07:44,631 00:07:47,756 -She just called you out of the blue? -No, I found her. 111 00:07:47,839 --> 00:07:52,548 I hired a detective. I spent all my money. Now we're going to meet. 112 00:07:52,589 --> 00:07:55,588 - You think she'll recognize me? - Of course she will, won't she? 113 00:07:55,672 --> 00:07:57,588 - Yeah. - She will. 114 00:08:18,586 --> 00:08:20,545 Vera Baker. 115 00:08:21,586 --> 00:08:23,545 My baby-- 116 00:08:27,253 --> 00:08:30,460 00:08:33,044 This is Merrill. 118 00:08:35,377 --> 00:08:37,419 No! That's unacceptable! 119 00:08:37,544 --> 00:08:41,335 If we don't ship by Tuesday, we won't be in the stores by Mother's Day. 120 00:08:41,419 --> 00:08:44,334 That's unacceptable, so don't give me any excuses, and do it! 121 00:08:44,418 --> 00:08:47,209 Do it! Just shut up and get it done! 122 00:08:49,876 --> 00:08:53,333 Oh, honey, you broke your phone. 123 00:08:53,375 --> 00:08:57,500 00:09:03,083 - Why don't we sit down? - Yes. 125 00:09:11,166 --> 00:09:14,499 You probably have a thousand questions for me. 126 00:09:15,916 --> 00:09:19,540 I was young. I didn't tell anybody I was pregnant. 127 00:09:19,623 --> 00:09:23,248 And I felt I could handle it at the time. 128 00:09:23,331 --> 00:09:26,123 Hi. Do you think you gals could... 129 00:09:26,206 --> 00:09:28,205 pull yourselves together and bring us a drink? 130 00:09:28,289 --> 00:09:30,330 00:09:32,372 Sure. What would you like? 132 00:09:32,455 --> 00:09:34,705 Mimosa. 133 00:09:34,789 --> 00:09:38,747 They both want a mimosa. 134 00:09:38,789 --> 00:09:42,496 So, you sell cosmetics? 135 00:09:42,621 --> 00:09:46,246 Yeah. I have my own company. 136 00:09:46,329 --> 00:09:48,204 And we're going public. 137 00:09:49,288 --> 00:09:52,370 And you're not married? 138 00:09:52,453 --> 00:09:55,870 - Lucianne said you wouldn't. - Who? 139 00:09:55,953 --> 00:09:59,162 00:10:01,203 She said you needed me. 141 00:10:01,287 --> 00:10:04,952 - She did? - She said you were lonely... 142 00:10:05,036 --> 00:10:09,619 and you were worried about money and you had trouble sleeping. 143 00:10:12,536 --> 00:10:16,785 Who the hell isn't? 144 00:10:22,993 --> 00:10:24,993 See? I told you we didn't need a bellman. 145 00:10:25,035 --> 00:10:28,742 Yeah, well, congratulations, Randy. You avoided another tip. 146 00:10:28,825 --> 00:10:30,867 Those nickels and dimes add up, my dear. 147 00:10:30,950 --> 00:10:32,992 - I call this bed! - Hey, no fair. 148 00:10:33,075 --> 00:10:35,367 - You got to pick last night. - Go to hell, Jason. 149 00:10:35,409 --> 00:10:37,367 - Make me. - Hey, language, please. 150 00:10:37,409 --> 00:10:39,574 - Bev, his and her bathrobes. - Yes. 151 00:10:39,658 --> 00:10:41,616 - Look at that view. - Yeah. 152 00:10:41,699 --> 00:10:46,574 - Nice view. - Okay, honey. Why don't you unpack? 153 00:10:46,658 --> 00:10:49,324 - Okay. - I'm just gonna go look around. 154 00:10:49,449 --> 00:10:53,157 Wait, wait, wait. You're not going to the casino? 155 00:10:53,282 --> 00:10:56,657 No, no, of course not. 156 00:10:56,740 --> 00:11:00,532 I just drove from the Grand Canyon. Gotta stretch my legs. 157 00:11:00,615 --> 00:11:04,156 You swore to me on your mother's eyes we are here to see David Copperfield. 158 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:07,864 - No gambling. - I'm just lookin' around. 159 00:11:08,947 --> 00:11:12,364 In fact, I'm gonna go to the gift shop. 160 00:11:12,406 --> 00:11:14,488 I can jump farther than you. 161 00:11:14,571 --> 00:11:17,030 - I can jump farther. - No way. Watch. 162 00:11:19,655 --> 00:11:23,238 That's gotta hurt. Honey, kids need ya. 163 00:11:23,363 --> 00:11:25,695 - Hey, Nick. Nicky! - Hey. 164 00:11:25,779 --> 00:11:28,070 - You're not leaving? - I'm in court on Tuesday. 165 00:11:28,154 --> 00:11:31,570 - No, you're not. - I work for people who are. 166 00:11:31,654 --> 00:11:34,445 You pussy. You can't leave. It's still goin' on up there. 167 00:11:34,487 --> 00:11:36,861 Richie, I have to. I've had two hours sleep. 168 00:11:36,944 --> 00:11:39,861 Steve Cunningham just got another stripper. You got to see this one. 169 00:11:39,903 --> 00:11:41,861 - She's incredible. - I got to get back. 170 00:11:41,903 --> 00:11:45,111 No, you don't, Nick. I know you. You're scared. 171 00:11:45,194 --> 00:11:48,152 You're scared it's gonna get out of control up there. 172 00:11:48,235 --> 00:11:50,610 Someday you'll be up for attorney general and it'll haunt you. 173 00:11:50,693 --> 00:11:53,818 - I'm not having this conversation. - You didn't even gamble. 174 00:11:53,902 --> 00:11:56,152 Not one quarter. That's no way to live. 175 00:11:56,277 --> 00:11:59,277 In fact, that ain't even livin'. It's hiding. 176 00:11:59,402 --> 00:12:02,026 - I'm not hiding from anything. - Oh, no? 177 00:12:02,151 --> 00:12:04,609 Okay, then prove it. 178 00:12:04,692 --> 00:12:07,484 00:12:12,483 Here. Look. Nick, a paper. Come on. Take it. 180 00:12:12,525 --> 00:12:16,191 Take it. Come on, Nick. Take it. 181 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:22,566 I have a plane to catch, okay? 182 00:12:22,650 --> 00:12:25,232 I'll see you in Chicago. 183 00:12:26,899 --> 00:12:29,524 Oh, look, I won! I won! 184 00:12:29,607 --> 00:12:31,649 Look at the money comin' down. 185 00:12:31,774 --> 00:12:34,939 Look. Look, look, look. What's-- What's-- 186 00:12:34,981 --> 00:12:39,106 00:12:43,481 What? A dollar? 188 00:12:47,730 --> 00:12:49,688 Come on, baby. Come on! 189 00:13:06,271 --> 00:13:07,229 Come on. 190 00:13:08,646 --> 00:13:09,936 We won! 191 00:13:12,145 --> 00:13:17,353 - We won one. - What is this? This isn't money. 192 00:13:35,684 --> 00:13:37,893 That's the prize? A free buffet? 193 00:13:37,976 --> 00:13:40,059 Actually, it's not a buffet. 194 00:13:40,143 --> 00:13:43,768 It's a special reception at 10:00 in the penthouse conference room. 195 00:13:43,809 --> 00:13:46,433 "Where a spectacular... 196 00:13:46,475 --> 00:13:49,642 once-in-a-lifetime opportunity awaits you." 197 00:13:49,725 --> 00:13:51,683 That's all I know. 198 00:13:51,725 --> 00:13:54,517 - What do you think? - I think it's some kind of scam. 199 00:13:54,558 --> 00:13:57,141 Good! A scam! We'll do it. 200 00:13:57,182 --> 00:14:00,182 - I'll need to see some I.D. - Okay. 201 00:14:13,348 --> 00:14:15,431 There. I gambled. 202 00:14:22,014 --> 00:14:23,389 00:14:25,930 Family vacation? These are the moments you got to savor, right? 204 00:14:26,014 --> 00:14:28,639 - They'll never come around again. - Exactly. 205 00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:31,304 Excuse me. Do you know what's going on? 206 00:14:31,388 --> 00:14:33,304 Free grub. That's what's going on. 207 00:14:33,388 --> 00:14:35,846 This room is fabulous. 208 00:14:35,888 --> 00:14:39,221 00:14:42,263 Oh, my God. 210 00:14:42,304 --> 00:14:44,345 You should sue somebody. 211 00:14:44,428 --> 00:14:45,928 I did it myself. 212 00:14:46,053 --> 00:14:49,470 - What? - He did it himself from a kit. 213 00:14:49,553 --> 00:14:54,802 I knew I recognized you. You're the referee-- the bonehead. 214 00:14:54,886 --> 00:14:58,469 That's just the media blowing it out of proportion. 215 00:14:58,552 --> 00:15:02,844 00:15:05,427 - Everybody thinks we flip quarters. - Can I have a picture with you? 217 00:15:05,511 --> 00:15:07,551 It's really a commemorative coin. Look. 218 00:15:07,635 --> 00:15:09,551 - Smile. - Please. You-- 219 00:15:11,635 --> 00:15:16,135 Am I too late? Look. I won a coin. 220 00:15:16,260 --> 00:15:21,467 A gold coin. Isn't this wonderful? 221 00:15:21,550 --> 00:15:23,759 Look at this room. 222 00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:28,967 00:15:32,049 Yes! We're in it. 224 00:15:34,841 --> 00:15:37,299 I am Enrico Pollini. 225 00:15:37,383 --> 00:15:41,673 Now, I know what you are thinking. Enrico is a girl's name. 226 00:15:41,757 --> 00:15:44,548 - No, I wasn't. - No pun intended. 227 00:15:44,590 --> 00:15:49,340 - What pun is that? - Food. Look at all this food. 228 00:15:49,423 --> 00:15:55,256 What a beautiful party. Little cockdoggies. 229 00:15:55,339 --> 00:15:57,006 00:16:01,964 Wienies. I'm so sorry. My English is not so good. 231 00:16:02,006 --> 00:16:04,796 But I'm learning. 232 00:16:04,838 --> 00:16:07,338 That's it. Vera. We're outta here. 233 00:16:07,380 --> 00:16:09,713 -I want to say good-bye. Bye, y'all. -Excuse me. 234 00:16:09,796 --> 00:16:14,671 Thank you all for coming. I'm Donald Sinclair. I own this hotel. 235 00:16:14,713 --> 00:16:16,879 We don't have much time. 236 00:16:16,962 --> 00:16:22,629 00:16:28,003 The impact is going to kill every thing and everyone on this planet. 238 00:16:28,086 --> 00:16:32,919 I built a bunker in the basement strong enough to withstand the blast. 239 00:16:32,961 --> 00:16:36,044 There's room for eight people. I have chosen the seven of you, plus me. 240 00:16:36,128 --> 00:16:41,835 When this is over, we will repopulate and re-civilize the planet. 241 00:16:50,834 --> 00:16:55,126 00:17:01,292 A joke. He made a joke. 243 00:17:01,417 --> 00:17:05,791 Do sit down, please. Merrill, you and your mother can sit over here. 244 00:17:05,833 --> 00:17:09,500 - How do you know she's my mother? - Alas, there are no secrets anymore. 245 00:17:09,583 --> 00:17:13,832 Actually, that's not quite true. There is one secret, one last secret. 246 00:17:13,915 --> 00:17:18,415 It involves all of you. 247 00:17:19,874 --> 00:17:23,332 00:17:26,206 Ah, Mr. Schaffer! 249 00:17:26,248 --> 00:17:29,956 Curiosity got the better of you, eh? Come and sit down. 250 00:17:30,081 --> 00:17:33,956 - I'm fine. Thanks. - You haven't missed anything. 251 00:17:34,039 --> 00:17:35,998 We were just cutting to the chase. 252 00:17:36,081 --> 00:17:38,830 Cutting to the chase. 253 00:17:42,247 --> 00:17:44,330 Well, you'll laugh later. 254 00:17:44,413 --> 00:17:48,163 00:17:51,537 or hitting the state lottery are astronomical-- millions to one. 256 00:17:51,621 --> 00:17:55,329 A serious person doesn't even bother, but today... 257 00:17:55,371 --> 00:17:58,787 you have the chance of playing a game... 258 00:17:58,871 --> 00:18:01,745 where the odds of winning are one in six. 259 00:18:01,828 --> 00:18:04,661 One in six. 260 00:18:05,911 --> 00:18:07,286 It's one throw... 261 00:18:09,786 --> 00:18:11,786 00:18:18,285 This is my attorney, Mr. Grisham... 263 00:18:18,327 --> 00:18:21,702 who tragically was born without a personality. 264 00:18:21,785 --> 00:18:26,201 Mr. Grisham insists anyone who wishes to participate in our experiment... 265 00:18:26,243 --> 00:18:31,201 sign this waiver, absolving the casino from responsibility or damages... 266 00:18:31,243 --> 00:18:35,034 personal liability, blah, blah, blah. 267 00:18:35,159 --> 00:18:38,575 00:18:41,617 The young woman in the black coat. She looks desperate. 269 00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:44,117 Yes, but she has her mother with her. 270 00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:47,907 - That could slow her down, hmm? - Perhaps. 271 00:18:47,949 --> 00:18:51,407 Now, 563 miles from here... 272 00:18:51,491 --> 00:18:54,574 is a little town called Silver City, New Mexico. 273 00:18:54,657 --> 00:18:56,907 - Gold rush. - Quite right, Nick. 274 00:18:56,991 --> 00:18:59,323 00:19:02,156 It was the second largest gold rush in American history. 276 00:19:02,281 --> 00:19:06,823 Very good, Nick. I think Nick should be our captain. 277 00:19:09,740 --> 00:19:13,405 In downtown Silver City, there's a train station. 278 00:19:13,489 --> 00:19:16,197 As you go in the front door, there's some lockers on the right. 279 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,697 Mr. Grisham, do you have the keys? 280 00:19:19,780 --> 00:19:21,739 00:19:24,946 They all open the same locker. 282 00:19:24,988 --> 00:19:27,863 That's locker 001. 283 00:19:27,946 --> 00:19:31,654 Inside the locker is a red duffel bag. Inside the red duffel bag... 284 00:19:31,696 --> 00:19:33,987 is $2 million. 285 00:19:34,070 --> 00:19:38,862 In cash, fifties and hundreds, makes a pile about so big. 286 00:19:38,945 --> 00:19:41,987 First one there keeps it all. 287 00:19:43,653 --> 00:19:48,361 I put transmitting devices in your key rings to keep track of you. 288 00:19:48,444 --> 00:19:52,486 And that's it. 289 00:19:52,611 --> 00:19:53,527 Go. 290 00:19:56,236 --> 00:19:58,568 You just can't pick people at random. 291 00:19:58,651 --> 00:20:00,985 I can do anything I like, Owen. I'm eccentric. 292 00:20:02,651 --> 00:20:03,568 Go! 293 00:20:03,651 --> 00:20:06,360 Wait, wait. So, it's like a race? 294 00:20:07,526 --> 00:20:09,775 A race. It's a race. 295 00:20:09,859 --> 00:20:11,942 I hope I win. 296 00:20:12,025 --> 00:20:14,317 What are the rules? 297 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:18,109 00:20:22,233 There are no rules. 299 00:20:22,316 --> 00:20:24,274 Go. 300 00:20:26,066 --> 00:20:27,524 Go! 301 00:20:27,608 --> 00:20:31,940 So now when you say, "Go," you mean just go? 302 00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:35,482 Begin, commence, start moving. 303 00:20:35,565 --> 00:20:39,523 Theoretically, you have been racing for about 40 seconds. 304 00:20:39,565 --> 00:20:42,107 So far, Mr. Schaffer is winning... 305 00:20:42,190 --> 00:20:45,106 00:20:54,731 You're crazy! 307 00:20:54,856 --> 00:20:58,855 A race! A race! You have to pace yourself. 308 00:20:58,938 --> 00:21:02,896 Carbohydrate is important. Pasta is good. 309 00:21:02,980 --> 00:21:05,605 Breathing is important. 310 00:21:07,062 --> 00:21:10,520 Excuse me. One-- 311 00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:14,270 It's some sort of joke. It has to be. 312 00:21:14,354 --> 00:21:17,687 What kind of jackass just gives away $2 million? 313 00:21:17,729 --> 00:21:20,269 00:21:23,644 What kind of publicity? He swore us all to secrecy. 315 00:21:23,728 --> 00:21:28,519 -Maybe it's a secret publicity stunt. -A secret publicity stunt? 316 00:21:28,603 --> 00:21:30,060 Yes! 317 00:21:30,102 --> 00:21:32,143 I don't know what his angle is, but there's always an angle. 318 00:21:32,268 --> 00:21:35,310 Donald Sinclair-- People like him make millions of dollars... 319 00:21:35,393 --> 00:21:38,102 playing people like us for chumps. 320 00:21:38,185 --> 00:21:40,393 - I'm nobody's chump. - So you don't believe-- 321 00:21:40,477 --> 00:21:44,309 11:30, nonstop to Chicago. I'm gonna be on it. 322 00:21:45,017 --> 00:21:47,226 You know what? He's right. 323 00:21:47,309 --> 00:21:49,809 I'm not cuttin' short my first family vacation... 324 00:21:49,851 --> 00:21:52,392 in three years to go on some half-assed wild goose chase. 325 00:21:52,476 --> 00:21:56,183 Okay, so, you're not goin' for it? 326 00:21:58,266 --> 00:21:59,933 00:22:02,641 - Not me, no. - No. Great. 328 00:22:02,766 --> 00:22:05,182 - I guess that's that, huh? - Right. 329 00:22:05,265 --> 00:22:07,932 It was nice meetin' y'all. I'm gonna take the stairs. 330 00:22:08,015 --> 00:22:10,974 My room's just two floors down, so nice meetin' ya. 331 00:22:11,057 --> 00:22:13,265 Hey, have a nice vacation. 332 00:22:20,723 --> 00:22:22,764 You know, it's probably stuck. 333 00:22:23,889 --> 00:22:26,889 I think I'm gonna take the stairs too. 334 00:22:35,180 --> 00:22:36,388 Crap. 335 00:22:39,513 --> 00:22:41,887 - Go, go, go, go! - Come on, Vera! 336 00:22:46,637 --> 00:22:49,221 Watch out! 337 00:22:50,471 --> 00:22:52,636 Comin' through! 338 00:22:57,386 --> 00:22:59,095 Hold the door, please. 339 00:22:59,178 --> 00:23:01,928 Take your time. No rush. 340 00:23:02,011 --> 00:23:04,010 - Get up! - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! 341 00:23:04,052 --> 00:23:08,719 If we're all gonna go for it, why don't we go for it together? 342 00:23:08,844 --> 00:23:11,844 00:23:15,759 - Fifty-fifty? - You know what I mean. Whatever. 344 00:23:15,801 --> 00:23:17,759 Yes, yes, that's a good plan. 345 00:23:17,801 --> 00:23:20,926 It's a race. It's a race. 346 00:23:20,968 --> 00:23:24,093 I'm winning. I'm winning. 347 00:23:27,342 --> 00:23:29,133 And they're off! 348 00:23:30,342 --> 00:23:35,383 No one-- No one is offering you action like this. 349 00:23:35,467 --> 00:23:38,632 A horse race with animals that can think and plan... 350 00:23:38,716 --> 00:23:43,549 and lie and cheat and play dirty. 351 00:23:43,632 --> 00:23:46,924 It's the gambling experience of a lifetime. 352 00:23:46,966 --> 00:23:51,256 It's my way of saying I understand men like you. 353 00:23:51,340 --> 00:23:53,173 I know what you want. I know what you need. 354 00:23:53,256 --> 00:23:58,131 This casino-- my casino-- is where you belong. 355 00:24:00,423 --> 00:24:02,839 - I got it! - Excuse me! 356 00:24:02,922 --> 00:24:05,297 - To the airport. - You got it. 357 00:24:05,339 --> 00:24:08,005 We're out the door. I don't see you. Where are you? 358 00:24:08,047 --> 00:24:12,422 - I forgot to tip the maid. - Forget the maid. There he is! 359 00:24:12,547 --> 00:24:14,921 - Come on! Let's go! - Okay, okay. 360 00:24:16,004 --> 00:24:20,254 Bev, this is a real job! I swear! 361 00:24:21,671 --> 00:24:23,004 What is it? 362 00:24:25,170 --> 00:24:27,212 The job? What's the job? 363 00:24:29,378 --> 00:24:31,795 Ink for fountain pens. 364 00:24:34,212 --> 00:24:37,169 00:24:41,002 I love New Mexico. Honey, we'll go with you. 366 00:24:41,044 --> 00:24:43,794 - No! - Why not? 367 00:24:44,711 --> 00:24:48,793 Because we've already paid for the room. Now look who's wasting money. 368 00:24:49,918 --> 00:24:51,876 This was your idea to stop here. 369 00:24:51,918 --> 00:24:54,918 I don't care about David Copperfield. We're on vacation. We'll go with you. 370 00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:58,460 00:25:02,917 - Fine. - Yes! 372 00:25:02,959 --> 00:25:05,917 Fine. Fine. Here. Call the bellman. Have him bring the van around. 373 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:08,084 - You happy? You happy? - Okay. 374 00:25:08,167 --> 00:25:12,624 Excuse me. Excuse me. I'm in a race. Scusi. 375 00:25:12,708 --> 00:25:15,416 Scusi. It's a race. 376 00:25:29,623 --> 00:25:33,165 - What is he doing? - I think he's sleeping. 377 00:25:33,248 --> 00:25:35,206 00:25:37,206 It's a rare sleeping disorder. 379 00:25:37,289 --> 00:25:40,622 - But I bet on him! - So did I. Two million dollars. 380 00:25:40,706 --> 00:25:43,247 I'm sorry, gentlemen. All the bets are locked in. 381 00:25:43,331 --> 00:25:45,289 Sleeping! Sleeping! 382 00:25:53,788 --> 00:25:55,830 - Look out! - Don't tell me how to drive! 383 00:25:55,955 --> 00:25:57,538 It's only yellow. It's only yellow. Run it! 384 00:25:59,620 --> 00:26:03,287 00:26:07,787 - Honey, what is the rush? - It's the opportunity of a lifetime. 386 00:26:07,829 --> 00:26:10,619 You're not just a travel agent, Roger. You're an angel. 387 00:26:10,661 --> 00:26:13,286 There's one charter plane available in Las Vegas. 388 00:26:13,328 --> 00:26:15,328 We just bagged it. 389 00:26:15,369 --> 00:26:17,328 - Back to pass. - Get rid of it. 390 00:26:17,369 --> 00:26:20,869 - Looks to his left. - Get rid of it. Throw the ball! 391 00:26:20,952 --> 00:26:23,452 That's why you're not gonna get drafted! 392 00:26:23,535 --> 00:26:26,535 You'll be lucky to play arena football in Barcelona! 393 00:26:26,660 --> 00:26:29,493 - You like football? - Sure. 394 00:26:29,577 --> 00:26:33,534 Did you happen to catch that Dallas game last week? 395 00:26:33,659 --> 00:26:38,742 It was an obscenity. It was a crime against football. 396 00:26:38,784 --> 00:26:41,534 I lost 20 grand on that game! And they would have won! 397 00:26:41,617 --> 00:26:45,075 00:26:49,283 Stevie Wonder could have done a better job calling that game. 399 00:26:51,491 --> 00:26:53,450 Where the hell's the airport? 400 00:26:55,408 --> 00:26:58,990 One flip of the coin and the franchise goes straight down the crapper. 401 00:26:59,115 --> 00:27:01,199 - That'll be 10.50, buddy. - Keep the change. 402 00:27:02,365 --> 00:27:05,865 Thanks a lot. You have a nice flight. Yeah! 403 00:27:05,990 --> 00:27:08,114 00:27:12,239 That was the ref. The guy from the game? The coin toss! 405 00:27:12,281 --> 00:27:15,239 Oh, my God! You're right! That was him! 406 00:27:15,281 --> 00:27:17,573 I had him in the cab, and I let him go! 407 00:27:17,698 --> 00:27:20,363 - Where are we going? - We gotta go. Come on. Just go. 408 00:27:20,447 --> 00:27:23,655 - Go, go, go, go, go. - Chumps. 409 00:27:49,028 --> 00:27:51,195 Excuse me. Hi. 410 00:27:51,945 --> 00:27:55,360 00:28:00,985 I never do this, but I'm reading the same book you are. 412 00:28:01,027 --> 00:28:03,152 Look. See? Lindbergh. 413 00:28:03,235 --> 00:28:05,194 It's fantastic, isn't it? 414 00:28:05,235 --> 00:28:09,068 - What part are you on? - He just had a sex change. 415 00:28:09,151 --> 00:28:11,234 Who did? Lindbergh? 416 00:28:11,318 --> 00:28:13,734 - Sex change? - Yeah. 417 00:28:17,900 --> 00:28:19,150 00:28:21,067 - I thought so. - That's funny. 419 00:28:21,108 --> 00:28:23,067 I wouldn't be too proud of yourself though. 420 00:28:23,108 --> 00:28:25,067 I'm the most gullible guy in Chicago. 421 00:28:28,608 --> 00:28:30,149 Can I buy you a drink? 422 00:28:31,149 --> 00:28:32,732 I can't. I'm flying. 423 00:28:32,816 --> 00:28:37,857 - So, it'll relax you. - I mean, I'm flying. I'm a pilot. 424 00:28:41,273 --> 00:28:44,106 Pilot? Are there a lot of female pilots? 425 00:28:45,190 --> 00:28:46,773 There's at least one. 426 00:28:49,981 --> 00:28:53,397 When I walk away, I'm gonna think of something great to say to that. 427 00:28:53,439 --> 00:28:56,064 Good. Mail it to me. 428 00:29:01,272 --> 00:29:03,522 Flight 115 to Albuquerque, New Mexico. 429 00:29:03,605 --> 00:29:06,604 - Gate 17. You better hurry. - Four tickets to Albuquerque. 430 00:29:06,688 --> 00:29:09,479 -Near the front of the plane. Please. -All right. 431 00:29:09,563 --> 00:29:11,521 00:29:15,521 This is so exciting. I've never been on a private plane before. 433 00:29:15,603 --> 00:29:17,645 This is bigger than my condo. 434 00:29:17,728 --> 00:29:20,395 - Gentlemen, what's our ETA? - One hour and ten minutes. 435 00:29:21,187 --> 00:29:23,687 If you can do it in less than an hour, I'll buy you both dinner. 436 00:29:23,770 --> 00:29:25,395 You're on-- 437 00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:28,519 - Watch it. Move. Excuse me. Move. - Move! Move! Move! 438 00:29:28,602 --> 00:29:30,561 00:29:31,894 - I was! - I was! 440 00:29:31,977 --> 00:29:34,686 - What? You were not next! - Are you callin' me a liar? 441 00:29:34,769 --> 00:29:38,477 Yeah, as a matter of fact, I am. We've been in line over 20 minutes. 442 00:29:38,519 --> 00:29:41,893 - Is that the correct time? - Hey! Whoa! 443 00:29:41,976 --> 00:29:44,143 Yes, it is. 444 00:29:45,185 --> 00:29:47,435 - Who's next? - They were, right there. 445 00:29:47,518 --> 00:29:50,268 00:29:54,725 I'm sorry. We're completely booked. There's nothing. 447 00:29:54,767 --> 00:29:57,559 There's a 4:30, but you have to switch in Dallas. 448 00:30:02,266 --> 00:30:07,099 What do you mean that's it? I'm not givin' up and neither are you. 449 00:30:07,141 --> 00:30:10,849 And neither am I! I'll tell you something, brother. 450 00:30:10,933 --> 00:30:14,848 If we're not flyin' outta here, no one is flyin' outta here. 451 00:31:14,802 --> 00:31:16,218 00:31:26,176 Duane! 453 00:31:38,300 --> 00:31:39,758 No! 454 00:31:48,215 --> 00:31:50,757 Blaine! Blaine! 455 00:31:53,799 --> 00:31:57,465 Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! 456 00:32:03,839 --> 00:32:05,464 Shit! 457 00:32:16,338 --> 00:32:19,713 I can't! 458 00:32:19,797 --> 00:32:23,921 What are you doin'? I don't know where to go! 459 00:32:23,962 --> 00:32:25,921 - Move! - Trying to kill me? 460 00:32:25,962 --> 00:32:30,254 Duane, stop the car! Stop the car! 461 00:32:41,336 --> 00:32:45,335 00:33:02,168 Freeze everything, every flight. Get me Central Operations. 463 00:33:04,459 --> 00:33:06,376 Attention all passengers. 464 00:33:06,459 --> 00:33:08,917 Due to a technical problem with our radar tracking system... 465 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,458 all flights are postponed until further notice. 466 00:33:11,542 --> 00:33:14,708 We apologize for any inconvenience. 467 00:33:16,333 --> 00:33:17,208 We gotta go. 468 00:33:17,333 --> 00:33:18,583 - Hurry up! - The bags? 469 00:33:18,708 --> 00:33:20,624 Forget the bags! Let's go! 470 00:33:20,707 --> 00:33:22,999 Comin' through! 471 00:33:24,082 --> 00:33:27,291 - This is your license? - Yes, it is. 472 00:33:28,374 --> 00:33:30,291 - Where was it issued? - In Guam. 473 00:33:34,248 --> 00:33:36,873 Just head east, and I'm in a hurry. 474 00:33:37,748 --> 00:33:42,165 Hello again. East it is. 475 00:33:43,705 --> 00:33:46,747 We have a midsized Caprice. 476 00:33:46,830 --> 00:33:49,414 - What color is it? - We don't care about color. 477 00:33:49,539 --> 00:33:52,122 Just give us whatever car is parked closest to the door. 478 00:33:52,247 --> 00:33:54,705 Ask about insurance. 479 00:33:54,830 --> 00:33:58,121 Would you be interested in purchasing liability insurance? 480 00:33:58,204 --> 00:34:00,788 - How much is it? - It doesn't matter. We'll take it. 481 00:34:00,871 --> 00:34:02,871 Just hurry. 482 00:34:06,121 --> 00:34:09,245 Hit enter. Now shift. 483 00:34:10,328 --> 00:34:12,662 Shift key. Right there. Yeah. 484 00:34:16,412 --> 00:34:17,870 00:34:21,119 Bus! White people! 486 00:34:24,036 --> 00:34:24,911 ldiot! 487 00:34:26,036 --> 00:34:28,119 Okay, I've got one. 488 00:34:29,244 --> 00:34:31,535 - What? - A great comeback. 489 00:34:33,785 --> 00:34:35,868 I said, "Are there a lot of female pilots?" 490 00:34:35,951 --> 00:34:37,910 And you said, "There's at least one." 491 00:34:37,993 --> 00:34:41,451 I should have said, "Two if you count Lindbergh." 492 00:34:42,534 --> 00:34:44,534 'Cause you said he had a sex change. 493 00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:47,159 It's a work in progress. 494 00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:49,534 - I'm Nick Schaffer. - Tracy Faucet. 495 00:34:49,617 --> 00:34:51,617 So I guess you can have that drink now. 496 00:34:51,700 --> 00:34:55,158 I told you I'm flying. I'm leaving for Roswell in five minutes. 497 00:34:55,199 --> 00:34:57,491 Didn't you hear? Everybody's grounded. 498 00:34:57,574 --> 00:35:01,699 That's for fixed wing. I'm in a chopper. We use a different system. 499 00:35:07,948 --> 00:35:10,407 00:35:15,198 - You're flying to New Mexico? - We've been flying down all week. 501 00:35:15,282 --> 00:35:17,239 They're repainting the whole fleet. 502 00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:25,531 You can fly. Nobody else can fly. 503 00:35:25,614 --> 00:35:28,696 But you can fly. 504 00:35:28,780 --> 00:35:31,780 - And you're flying to New Mexico. - Yeah. 505 00:35:31,863 --> 00:35:34,946 - But nobody else can fly. - Yeah. 506 00:35:35,030 --> 00:35:38,280 00:35:44,279 Come on! 508 00:35:49,695 --> 00:35:52,486 - Coconut. - Coconut! Who had coconut? 509 00:35:52,569 --> 00:35:55,361 I did. 510 00:35:55,444 --> 00:35:57,153 Phil. 511 00:35:58,736 --> 00:36:00,819 That's the kind of car that I'm gettin'. 512 00:36:00,903 --> 00:36:03,693 - Yeah? Don't count on it. - Why not? 513 00:36:03,735 --> 00:36:06,735 Because the Volkswagen Beetle was used by the Nazis. 514 00:36:06,818 --> 00:36:10,068 I would not be comfortable driving around in one. 515 00:36:10,152 --> 00:36:14,610 - So, don't drive it. I will. - Dad, I have to go. 516 00:36:14,652 --> 00:36:18,151 - No, you don't. - Yes, I do. I really do. 517 00:36:18,276 --> 00:36:22,526 - We just stopped! - The bathroom was too gross. 518 00:36:22,609 --> 00:36:26,691 - Well, can't you hold it in? - I can't! It's an emergency. 519 00:36:26,775 --> 00:36:28,691 Honey, there's a restaurant. 520 00:36:28,775 --> 00:36:31,733 That's three miles down and then back. We lose ten minutes. 521 00:36:31,816 --> 00:36:34,025 00:36:36,525 - Please stop, Dad. - All right. 523 00:36:36,566 --> 00:36:39,190 Jason, look back there for an empty jar. 524 00:36:39,274 --> 00:36:41,357 A jar? Girls don't pee in jars. 525 00:36:41,399 --> 00:36:43,357 All right, sorry. 526 00:36:43,399 --> 00:36:47,065 Jason, we're gonna need a jar and a funnel. 527 00:36:47,149 --> 00:36:49,731 Dad, I don't have to pee. It's number two! 528 00:36:49,856 --> 00:36:54,273 00:36:55,773 What does that mean? 530 00:36:55,814 --> 00:36:59,523 Like when a prairie dog sticks his head in and out of the ground. 531 00:37:04,188 --> 00:37:06,688 I do not want to picture that. 532 00:37:07,772 --> 00:37:10,397 Yes, sir, Silver City it is. 533 00:37:10,480 --> 00:37:13,771 - Buddy. - It's about 700 miles. 534 00:37:13,854 --> 00:37:18,229 - You don't mind, do ya? - Oh, no. No, no, I don't mind. 535 00:37:18,271 --> 00:37:21,687 00:37:24,728 About how much you think that's gonna cost? 537 00:37:24,853 --> 00:37:29,561 I wouldn't worry about it. Tell you what. 538 00:37:29,645 --> 00:37:33,811 You just pay me whatever you think is fair... 539 00:37:33,895 --> 00:37:38,727 'cause I trust your judgment. 540 00:37:38,810 --> 00:37:41,810 I hate you. I hate you! 541 00:37:41,852 --> 00:37:46,144 Nobody look. I'm gonna turn on the radio, so nobody can hear you. 542 00:37:46,227 --> 00:37:48,143 00:37:50,809 Nobody can hear you, honey. Push away. 544 00:37:59,434 --> 00:38:02,517 I'm gonna drop you off there. There's a parking lot near the hospital. 545 00:38:02,642 --> 00:38:06,100 - Great. Great. - So what's wrong with her? 546 00:38:06,225 --> 00:38:09,142 -Who? -Your sister. You said it's serious. 547 00:38:11,766 --> 00:38:14,016 Yeah. Shark bite. 548 00:38:15,099 --> 00:38:17,849 - A shark bite? - Yeah. 549 00:38:17,932 --> 00:38:20,557 00:38:24,015 They have a really good shark attack unit there. 551 00:38:31,973 --> 00:38:33,931 How fast was I going? 552 00:38:41,514 --> 00:38:45,472 - Where are we? - It's a shortcut I know. 553 00:38:45,555 --> 00:38:49,554 -Maybe we should stick to the highway. -There's a thought. 554 00:38:49,638 --> 00:38:53,846 You say stick to the highway. I say we should take my shortcut. 555 00:38:53,929 --> 00:38:58,637 - Why don't we just flip a coin? - It's not what you think. 556 00:38:58,720 --> 00:39:02,012 - Come on, you blind son of a bitch! - Wait! Stop it! 557 00:39:02,095 --> 00:39:05,803 Give me that goddamn whistle! I'm gonna shove it up your ass! 558 00:39:05,928 --> 00:39:08,095 Come back here! 559 00:39:11,302 --> 00:39:14,136 Shit. 560 00:39:16,344 --> 00:39:18,844 I'll kill him. 561 00:39:36,300 --> 00:39:38,300 - Squirrel? - No, thank you. 562 00:39:38,384 --> 00:39:40,800 We're looking for the interstate. 563 00:39:40,884 --> 00:39:44,341 I get that a lot 'cause of the detour. 564 00:39:45,674 --> 00:39:48,508 Now they've lost their way. 565 00:39:48,591 --> 00:39:52,758 Now they can't go home. You sure you don't want one? 566 00:39:52,841 --> 00:39:54,508 We're sure. Thank you. 567 00:39:54,591 --> 00:39:58,257 They make crackerjack pets. I taught this one to shake hands. 568 00:39:58,340 --> 00:40:02,423 He's not for sale though. Who wants to go home with the nice ladies? 569 00:40:02,507 --> 00:40:05,798 "Pick me. Pick me. Don't be afraid. I don't bite. 570 00:40:05,882 --> 00:40:10,256 00:40:12,714 Ma'am, really. We're not interested. 572 00:40:12,797 --> 00:40:15,839 Well, I'm not talkin' to you, am I? I'm talkin' to Vera. 573 00:40:15,964 --> 00:40:20,380 What about Bucky here? He loves to climb trees and eat nuts. 574 00:40:20,463 --> 00:40:22,546 Ma'am, we do not want a squirrel. 575 00:40:22,630 --> 00:40:24,755 Do you or do you not know where the interstate is? 576 00:40:24,838 --> 00:40:28,213 00:40:30,671 Thank you, Bucky. 578 00:40:30,713 --> 00:40:34,170 I almost forgot. There's a dandy shortcut. 579 00:40:34,212 --> 00:40:36,920 It'll bring you right to exit 14. It'll save you 30 miles. 580 00:40:37,962 --> 00:40:40,045 Now listen carefully. 581 00:40:40,129 --> 00:40:43,586 You want to go straight down here exactly 1.8 miles. 582 00:40:43,711 --> 00:40:47,961 - 1.8. - Make a left at Totem Pole Ranch. 583 00:40:48,044 --> 00:40:50,794 Go 5.4 miles and you're gonna go up a big hill. 584 00:40:50,878 --> 00:40:54,460 You'll see a big yellow sign with some graffiti on it. 585 00:40:54,543 --> 00:40:59,127 Take the dirt road on the right. It'll take you to the interstate. 586 00:40:59,168 --> 00:41:00,460 - Thank you. - Thank you. 587 00:41:00,502 --> 00:41:04,877 Wait a minute. Take some nuts with you... 588 00:41:04,960 --> 00:41:07,626 just in case you see a squirrel, okay? 589 00:41:09,084 --> 00:41:13,542 00:41:16,334 You'll make it. You'll make it. 591 00:41:22,958 --> 00:41:24,625 Where am I? 592 00:41:28,166 --> 00:41:31,290 Wow! A Barbie Museum! Can we stop? 593 00:41:31,374 --> 00:41:35,707 Sorry, Kimmy. We have a plan, and we're gonna stick to the plan. 594 00:41:35,790 --> 00:41:38,207 Please, Daddy. Please, please, please, please, please. 595 00:41:38,290 --> 00:41:40,706 - Hey, hey! - It's not fair. 596 00:41:40,748 --> 00:41:43,373 00:41:46,706 I'm sure Jason doesn't want to go to the Barbie Museum. 598 00:41:46,748 --> 00:41:50,206 You kiddin'? I'll stop anywhere. I'm wiggin' out back here. 599 00:41:50,289 --> 00:41:53,872 You need to pull over and stop to give the kids a break. 600 00:41:53,997 --> 00:41:55,872 Yeah, okay, maybe on the way back. 601 00:41:55,955 --> 00:41:57,913 - Stop the car. - I can't do that. 602 00:41:58,038 --> 00:41:59,997 00:42:02,455 - You need to stop the car. - No! 604 00:42:02,538 --> 00:42:03,996 Stop the car! 605 00:42:10,704 --> 00:42:13,246 Okay, fine, but 10 minutes. 606 00:42:13,329 --> 00:42:16,661 Wow! The Barbie Museum. 607 00:42:17,703 --> 00:42:19,036 Klaus Barbie... 608 00:42:19,120 --> 00:42:21,411 sometimes known as the Butcher of Lyons. 609 00:42:21,495 --> 00:42:25,536 Let the Jew revisionists talk about their death camps... 610 00:42:25,620 --> 00:42:28,577 00:42:34,035 This museum is lovingly dedicated to the Klaus Barbie that nobody knows. 612 00:42:34,119 --> 00:42:37,910 The husband, the devoted father, the wine connoisseur... 613 00:42:37,994 --> 00:42:40,909 and three-time ballroom dancing champion. 614 00:42:48,034 --> 00:42:50,783 Hey, hey, there's that guy, the "udgy" one. 615 00:42:53,117 --> 00:42:56,492 Barbie joined the SS in 1935... 616 00:42:56,575 --> 00:43:00,408 00:43:02,866 Can we go? 618 00:43:02,949 --> 00:43:06,116 Here we see him standing beside Hitler's touring car... 619 00:43:06,199 --> 00:43:10,324 the very same car on display outside in our courtyard. 620 00:43:10,407 --> 00:43:11,657 You're leaving? 621 00:43:13,241 --> 00:43:15,281 What-- 622 00:43:15,365 --> 00:43:20,115 No-- Yes. Well, we have a 4:30 book burning, and then we have a-- 623 00:43:20,198 --> 00:43:22,198 00:43:26,322 for one of our many white, Christian, non-Jewish friends-- 625 00:43:26,405 --> 00:43:32,072 -Family. Blood relatives. -The Himmler Hessin Von Sturichberg-- 626 00:43:32,155 --> 00:43:34,614 - Thank you so much. - Yes, love your do. 627 00:43:34,739 --> 00:43:36,739 Thank you. It's beautiful. We had a great time. 628 00:43:38,071 --> 00:43:39,738 Wow! A gift shop. 629 00:43:39,779 --> 00:43:43,113 Yes, I know, honey. Next time. I promise. I really do. 630 00:43:43,154 --> 00:43:45,154 Just go. Just go. 631 00:43:45,238 --> 00:43:49,945 - Oh, my God! We've been cut! - What do we do now? 632 00:43:51,028 --> 00:43:52,487 I say we take the interstate. 633 00:43:52,528 --> 00:43:56,070 No, "ake" Highway "well." That's a shortcut. 634 00:43:56,153 --> 00:43:59,862 You don't know what the shortcut is. It could be a dirt road. 635 00:43:59,945 --> 00:44:03,861 You know what? There are "oo" of us. Why don't we separate? 636 00:44:03,902 --> 00:44:06,902 00:44:10,361 "Amy" we should "ust" separate. 638 00:44:10,444 --> 00:44:14,110 You're right. You're a genius. There's two of us. 639 00:44:14,193 --> 00:44:17,151 If we separate and you steal a car, we can both go our own way... 640 00:44:17,193 --> 00:44:19,151 and double our chances of gettin' there first. 641 00:44:19,235 --> 00:44:21,776 All right. You take the-- 642 00:44:21,860 --> 00:44:24,150 We only got one "ee." 643 00:44:26,609 --> 00:44:30,734 00:44:35,192 1.8 miles exactly. All right, squirrel lady. 645 00:44:39,191 --> 00:44:43,899 I can't believe it, Dad. You stole Adolf Hitler's Mercedes-Benz. 646 00:44:43,941 --> 00:44:48,232 Hitler had it comin'. What goes around comes around. 647 00:44:48,273 --> 00:44:50,273 They're gonna be pissed. 648 00:44:50,315 --> 00:44:54,898 They're always pissed. They're Nazis. It's like it's their job. 649 00:44:54,982 --> 00:45:00,272 00:45:07,272 North? 651 00:45:07,356 --> 00:45:09,772 A little detour. It'll just take a minute. 652 00:45:09,856 --> 00:45:12,355 I just wanted to say hi to my boyfriend. 653 00:45:20,605 --> 00:45:24,270 I can't believe it. That-- That son of a bitch! 654 00:45:24,312 --> 00:45:26,354 That's Charlene's car. 655 00:45:26,437 --> 00:45:29,812 -Charlene? -His ex-girlfriend, or so I thought. 656 00:45:29,854 --> 00:45:34,061 00:45:37,144 She probably came by just to pick up some clothes or-- 658 00:45:37,228 --> 00:45:40,269 Nice and warm. 659 00:45:46,518 --> 00:45:48,018 What the-- 660 00:45:48,102 --> 00:45:50,352 Get down! 661 00:45:52,268 --> 00:45:55,893 Did I come at a bad time, asshole? 662 00:45:58,517 --> 00:46:01,892 I'll ram this helicopter right down your throat! 663 00:46:07,017 --> 00:46:08,142 What are you doing? 664 00:46:08,184 --> 00:46:12,975 00:46:15,933 I'm not worried about you. I'm worried about me. 666 00:46:16,016 --> 00:46:20,515 Shawn, you have a minute? I want to talk about our relationship. 667 00:46:34,639 --> 00:46:36,431 Suck on that, creep! 668 00:46:39,139 --> 00:46:42,056 - That's-- - Not the truck! 669 00:46:42,139 --> 00:46:45,055 Oh, my God! 670 00:46:45,180 --> 00:46:47,347 Come on. Help me. Open it. 671 00:46:47,430 --> 00:46:49,097 00:46:51,138 - Open it! - Okay. 673 00:46:57,596 --> 00:46:59,054 She's gonna kill me. 674 00:46:59,096 --> 00:47:01,679 - We should get outta here. - Not yet! 675 00:47:02,804 --> 00:47:06,262 You two-timing, backstabbing snake! 676 00:47:06,346 --> 00:47:08,511 You worm! You turd! 677 00:47:11,428 --> 00:47:17,136 My God! What was I thinking? I want my five months back! 678 00:47:18,552 --> 00:47:21,094 I'm getting the tattoo removed! 679 00:47:25,219 --> 00:47:27,177 00:47:30,634 Where are you goin', baby? Wait for me! 681 00:47:49,842 --> 00:47:54,632 - I think we just killed him. - You can't! He's like a cockroach. 682 00:48:00,757 --> 00:48:02,174 Fix the-- 683 00:48:06,340 --> 00:48:08,381 Should we be this low? 684 00:48:13,631 --> 00:48:16,964 Come on. Come on. Let's keep goin'. Come on. 685 00:48:20,505 --> 00:48:23,839 We just violated about 115 federal laws. 686 00:48:23,922 --> 00:48:26,589 - "We"? - I'm getting out of here. Coming? 687 00:48:28,546 --> 00:48:30,504 I know things look bad-- 688 00:48:32,629 --> 00:48:34,546 Nice meeting you. 689 00:48:37,754 --> 00:48:39,754 Get out of the truck, Shawn. 690 00:48:41,212 --> 00:48:43,295 That's it, Tracy. You and I are through. 691 00:48:46,878 --> 00:48:48,462 Wait! 692 00:48:56,002 --> 00:48:59,669 Wait. This is the first illegal thing I've done in my adult life. 693 00:48:59,752 --> 00:49:01,711 How does it feel? 694 00:49:01,752 --> 00:49:05,085 I'm shaking, but that could be from the helicopter crash. 695 00:49:05,168 --> 00:49:09,376 - Get out of my truck, Tracy! - It's my truck! I paid for it! 696 00:49:09,460 --> 00:49:11,043 - Who is this? - Nobody. 697 00:49:11,126 --> 00:49:13,668 - You are nobody. - Nobody. 698 00:49:13,751 --> 00:49:17,709 You stay away from her, nobody, unless you're tired of livin'. 699 00:49:17,792 --> 00:49:22,042 While you're here, do me a favor. Charlene left a bra in the truck. 700 00:49:22,125 --> 00:49:25,500 Could you make sure she gets it? Thanks, honey. 701 00:49:25,584 --> 00:49:26,624 Help! 702 00:50:14,912 --> 00:50:17,912 - So where's the driver? - He's in the powder room. 703 00:50:17,995 --> 00:50:21,745 Hell's bells. We're never gonna get to Santa Fe by 3:00. 704 00:50:21,787 --> 00:50:23,745 - This is ridiculous. - Ridiculous. 705 00:50:23,787 --> 00:50:27,786 I really wish he'd hurry. It just seems very unprofessional. 706 00:50:34,744 --> 00:50:37,368 Mister, you gotta help me. My wife-- 707 00:50:37,452 --> 00:50:38,868 She's out back. She's having a baby. 708 00:50:38,952 --> 00:50:40,910 - She's having a what? - A baby! 709 00:50:40,993 --> 00:50:42,910 - She's having a baby? - And it's halfway out! 710 00:50:42,993 --> 00:50:45,368 I can see the head! 711 00:50:45,452 --> 00:50:48,409 - I need your jacket. - Why? 712 00:50:49,784 --> 00:50:52,701 For her amniotic sac! 713 00:50:52,742 --> 00:50:55,367 - Her amniotic fluid is gushing out. - Gushing? 714 00:50:55,451 --> 00:50:58,617 The jacket! The jacket! Give me the jacket! 715 00:50:58,701 --> 00:51:01,616 00:51:05,033 Your pants! Yeah, for her, you know, her "placentia"... 717 00:51:05,116 --> 00:51:08,116 you know, and her labia and cervical-- 718 00:51:08,158 --> 00:51:11,365 Mucus gushing-- It's gushing. 719 00:51:11,449 --> 00:51:14,990 It's just a hole and-- 720 00:51:15,032 --> 00:51:17,407 Quick! The pants. And the hat. 721 00:51:17,532 --> 00:51:19,199 Why? Why my hat? 722 00:51:21,365 --> 00:51:22,740 For her... 723 00:51:24,489 --> 00:51:25,739 00:51:31,156 Let's go, ladies. All aboard. We're on our way. 725 00:51:31,239 --> 00:51:35,738 - What happened to Marty? - His wife's having a baby. 726 00:51:35,863 --> 00:51:39,613 -A baby? -I'm Owen, your new driver. Let's go. 727 00:51:40,488 --> 00:51:42,113 Quiet. Quiet, everybody. 728 00:51:42,155 --> 00:51:44,113 Simmer down. Hey! 729 00:51:44,822 --> 00:51:48,154 We're gonna be under way in just a minute. This is Owen. 730 00:51:48,196 --> 00:51:51,029 00:51:53,571 Everyone say hello. 732 00:51:53,654 --> 00:51:57,529 Hello, Owen! 733 00:51:57,571 --> 00:52:00,153 Our next stop is the third annual... 734 00:52:00,236 --> 00:52:04,236 I Love Lucy convention in Santa Fe, New Mexico. 735 00:52:04,361 --> 00:52:08,070 - What do ya say? - Ba-ba-loo! 736 00:52:22,359 --> 00:52:24,651 Ooh! Ooh! 737 00:52:41,608 --> 00:52:44,607 - Is he dead? - Hey, mister, are you dead? 738 00:52:47,107 --> 00:52:50,149 It's a race. It's a race. It's a race. 739 00:52:51,232 --> 00:52:54,649 Run, run, like greased lightning. 740 00:52:55,441 --> 00:52:58,273 Taxi! Taxi! Taxi! 741 00:53:04,065 --> 00:53:06,356 Not good. Not good. 742 00:53:12,772 --> 00:53:15,355 Don't move! Stay there. I saw the whole thing. 743 00:53:15,439 --> 00:53:16,730 I'll be right down. 744 00:53:16,772 --> 00:53:20,479 Shit! Gloria Allred. 745 00:53:20,563 --> 00:53:23,896 Hey, buddy? Buddy, you okay? You okay? 746 00:53:23,979 --> 00:53:26,313 You're fine! You look great. 747 00:53:26,396 --> 00:53:28,396 00:53:30,438 You don't need a taxi. Come on! 749 00:53:30,521 --> 00:53:32,478 Where you goin'? Maybe I can drop you off. 750 00:53:32,562 --> 00:53:35,270 Silver City, New Mexico. I am in a race. 751 00:53:35,353 --> 00:53:37,937 Silver City? This is your lucky day! 752 00:53:38,020 --> 00:53:40,978 I'm going to El Paso. It's right on the way. 753 00:53:41,062 --> 00:53:44,894 Come on. But, look, I got to be there by 7:00 tonight. 754 00:53:44,977 --> 00:53:47,977 00:53:49,019 Yeah! 756 00:53:50,436 --> 00:53:54,268 You just want one copy, 'cause you get an extra one for half price? 757 00:53:54,310 --> 00:53:56,643 Just one and hurry. 758 00:53:56,726 --> 00:53:58,643 This is the best idea you ever had. 759 00:53:58,726 --> 00:54:01,268 We split up. We take two keys. We double our chances of winning. 760 00:54:01,351 --> 00:54:02,476 It can't fail. 761 00:54:02,560 --> 00:54:06,017 00:54:08,725 Right. Train station, locker 001. 763 00:54:08,809 --> 00:54:10,809 “I was, I was,” one. 764 00:54:10,892 --> 00:54:13,434 Rule number one: discretion. Don't talk to anybody. 765 00:54:13,517 --> 00:54:15,517 - I won't. I "romise." - I'm serious. 766 00:54:15,600 --> 00:54:18,349 We're talking about $2 million in cash. 767 00:54:18,433 --> 00:54:21,766 People would just kill us to get their hands on that key. 768 00:54:21,849 --> 00:54:24,891 I love you. 769 00:54:25,891 --> 00:54:27,808 All right, little brother, you steal a car. 770 00:54:27,891 --> 00:54:30,265 I'm gonna try to steal that Corvette right there. 771 00:54:30,307 --> 00:54:32,265 I don't care what you get as long as it's fast. 772 00:54:32,307 --> 00:54:35,557 I'll meet you in Silver City. Don't forget your key. 773 00:54:37,348 --> 00:54:40,681 That "other-ucking" bastard! 774 00:54:40,764 --> 00:54:43,722 00:54:48,722 There he is! 776 00:54:49,972 --> 00:54:52,721 Go! Go! 777 00:54:53,846 --> 00:54:56,388 Okay, we're at 2.4 miles. 778 00:54:56,471 --> 00:54:57,930 There's the yellow sign with the graffiti. 779 00:54:58,055 --> 00:54:59,763 - Turn right. - I see it. 780 00:54:59,805 --> 00:55:01,221 - Do you see it? - I see it. 781 00:55:01,305 --> 00:55:04,304 I just love this. This is like a treasure hunt. 782 00:55:06,845 --> 00:55:09,345 - Slow down! - I can't! 783 00:55:13,804 --> 00:55:15,844 Help! 784 00:55:45,217 --> 00:55:49,551 I guess my favorite episode, if l had to pick one, would be episode 34. 785 00:55:49,634 --> 00:55:52,883 Ladies, Lucys, Lucys, stay behind the line, please. 786 00:55:52,966 --> 00:55:56,216 Remember that one when Ricky wouldn't take his hat off? 787 00:55:56,258 --> 00:55:59,633 I don't remember that one. It sounds like a masterpiece. 788 00:55:59,758 --> 00:56:02,549 How about the one where she got caught in the freezer? 789 00:56:02,590 --> 00:56:06,632 00:56:18,214 Lucy, your hair! 791 00:56:18,298 --> 00:56:22,548 Thank you. I couldn't decide whether to keep it up or try something new. 792 00:56:22,631 --> 00:56:25,131 It's on fire! 793 00:56:33,005 --> 00:56:35,588 - Stop the bus! - We're not stoppin'! 794 00:56:35,713 --> 00:56:38,296 Just put it out! Just put it out! 795 00:56:38,421 --> 00:56:41,004 Stop! 796 00:56:41,629 --> 00:56:42,796 The bathroom! 797 00:57:12,959 --> 00:57:17,543 00:57:22,209 Two million dollars. Two million dollars. Two million dollars. 799 00:57:22,251 --> 00:57:24,958 The Donald Sinclair, the billionaire? 800 00:57:25,042 --> 00:57:28,250 It sounds crazy, I know, but I think it's on the level. 801 00:57:28,292 --> 00:57:31,208 Here's the thing. We have to decide yes or no right now. 802 00:57:31,292 --> 00:57:35,957 If everybody else had to drive, we have a three-hour head start. 803 00:57:35,999 --> 00:57:39,832 - So you're proposing? - A corporation-- Faucet and Schaffer. 804 00:57:39,957 --> 00:57:43,874 If we win, we split everything 50-50. You can even hold the key. 805 00:57:45,207 --> 00:57:46,874 What do ya think? 806 00:57:48,081 --> 00:57:50,623 I don't know what to think. I'm in shock. 807 00:57:50,706 --> 00:57:55,998 Three hours ago I was in the airport. I had a job. I was reading a book. 808 00:57:56,081 --> 00:57:58,540 My grandfather used to say, "Good things take time. 809 00:57:58,622 --> 00:58:01,247 Great things happen all at once." 810 00:58:06,997 --> 00:58:11,621 - Jason, where'd you get that? - I found it under the seat. 811 00:58:11,704 --> 00:58:15,871 - Give it to me. You can't play that. - Why not? 812 00:58:15,996 --> 00:58:19,204 Because it's Hitler's harmonica. You can't play Hitler's harmonica. 813 00:58:19,288 --> 00:58:23,703 - You're driving his car. - I'm not touching it with my mouth. 814 00:58:23,745 --> 00:58:27,453 00:58:29,537 Dad, look what I found. 816 00:58:29,620 --> 00:58:34,411 - Where'd you get those? - The floor. Look, I'm Mrs. Hitler. 817 00:58:34,494 --> 00:58:36,536 All right, take those off right now. 818 00:58:36,619 --> 00:58:39,536 Hey, look at this. A lipstick. It's dark. 819 00:58:39,619 --> 00:58:41,577 That Eva Braun had style, didn't she? 820 00:58:41,661 --> 00:58:44,411 - She was Hitler's girlfriend. - Give us a kiss. 821 00:58:44,494 --> 00:58:47,451 Bev, it's not funny. Give me that. 822 00:58:47,535 --> 00:58:49,576 - Honey! - I got it all over my hand. 823 00:58:49,701 --> 00:58:50,660 Oh... 824 00:58:50,701 --> 00:58:52,035 Randy. 825 00:58:57,992 --> 00:59:00,242 - Chain, chain, chain - R-E-S-P-E-C- T 826 00:59:00,325 --> 00:59:02,742 - Chain, chain, chain - find out what it means to me 827 00:59:02,784 --> 00:59:05,409 Respect Just a little bit 828 00:59:05,450 --> 00:59:07,742 - Just a little bit - Chain, chain, chain-- 829 00:59:07,784 --> 00:59:09,241 Just-- 830 00:59:11,158 --> 00:59:14,283 Look at us go. We are zooming. 831 00:59:14,408 --> 00:59:16,574 I told you. We're haulin' ass. 832 00:59:16,658 --> 00:59:20,490 We're haulin' ass. All righty. 833 00:59:23,990 --> 00:59:27,657 - Guess what I got back there. - You just told me. 834 00:59:27,698 --> 00:59:30,032 Ass. We're haulin' ass. 835 00:59:30,073 --> 00:59:32,697 No, no, no. That's just an expression. 836 00:59:36,572 --> 00:59:37,864 It's a heart. 837 00:59:39,156 --> 00:59:42,947 00:59:47,113 Some lucky bastard in El Paso's waiting for it. 839 00:59:47,821 --> 00:59:52,655 Normally, they put it on a plane, but the airport's all closed down. 840 00:59:56,987 --> 01:00:00,362 - You wanna see it? - See what? 841 01:00:09,778 --> 01:00:11,778 Are we allowed? 842 01:00:11,819 --> 01:00:15,444 Just take a peek. One peek. What could happen? 843 01:00:17,319 --> 01:00:20,277 It's a heart. It needs fresh air. 844 01:00:20,318 --> 01:00:23,318 01:01:02,024 - Oopsy-daisy. I get it. I get it. - Shit! Oh, please! 846 01:01:02,107 --> 01:01:04,607 - Don't step on it! - I think I found it. 847 01:01:04,690 --> 01:01:06,606 No, that's a caramel apple. 848 01:01:19,105 --> 01:01:21,438 This is wrong. This is so wrong. 849 01:01:21,522 --> 01:01:24,480 God is gonna smote us. We're gonna get smote. 850 01:01:24,605 --> 01:01:27,272 Come on. We're siphoning gas. It's not a smoting offense. 851 01:01:27,397 --> 01:01:29,312 What? 852 01:01:35,854 --> 01:01:37,854 Shouldn't be turning me on, should it? 853 01:01:42,353 --> 01:01:44,020 - Hey! - Hi. 854 01:01:44,061 --> 01:01:47,895 - What are you doing? - Seventeen cups of coffee. 855 01:01:52,560 --> 01:01:54,644 I guess-- 856 01:01:54,727 --> 01:01:56,602 I guess that's it. 857 01:01:58,685 --> 01:02:02,019 I guess not. How do you turn this thing off? 858 01:02:02,644 --> 01:02:04,226 Son of a bitch! 859 01:02:11,768 --> 01:02:15,850 - Man! Damn it! - Keep going. Go! Go! 860 01:02:18,433 --> 01:02:20,392 He's stopping. 861 01:02:20,433 --> 01:02:22,433 'Cause he knows, don't mess with us. 862 01:02:42,431 --> 01:02:44,348 We gotta wait. There's too much wind. 863 01:02:44,431 --> 01:02:49,015 - Guys, I need this balloon. - Hey, what are you doing? 864 01:02:49,098 --> 01:02:51,055 Hey, man, what-- 865 01:02:55,639 --> 01:02:57,722 - Hey, hey! - I know what I'm doing! 866 01:03:02,179 --> 01:03:05,596 I'm coming to get you! Get back here! 867 01:03:10,304 --> 01:03:14,220 01:03:24,886 - Go! Go! - Stand up. Grab the rope. 869 01:03:24,969 --> 01:03:28,469 I'm gonna get you! Stand up. Ready? Grab it. 870 01:03:30,552 --> 01:03:32,511 Missed it. 871 01:03:32,594 --> 01:03:36,801 - Duane! Duane, stop the car! - Hang on, buddy. 872 01:03:36,885 --> 01:03:38,885 Duane, please stop. 873 01:03:41,676 --> 01:03:44,843 I got it! I got it! Just hang on. 874 01:03:52,675 --> 01:03:56,967 - Stop it! Blaine! - My God! You're gonna kill me! 875 01:03:58,050 --> 01:04:00,008 The cows! 876 01:04:03,841 --> 01:04:05,174 Move! 877 01:04:09,466 --> 01:04:10,924 Watch out! 878 01:04:31,422 --> 01:04:32,547 Shit. 879 01:04:44,921 --> 01:04:47,045 Oh, God! 880 01:04:55,837 --> 01:04:58,711 Help! 881 01:05:03,294 --> 01:05:05,294 - Give me my key. - What are you talking about? 882 01:05:05,378 --> 01:05:07,419 Give me back my key. The key! 883 01:05:09,752 --> 01:05:11,877 Give me the key. 884 01:05:59,623 --> 01:06:03,456 Blaine! Blaine! It's me. 885 01:06:14,663 --> 01:06:16,580 01:06:24,871 How's it going, Captain? 887 01:06:24,954 --> 01:06:26,912 So far, so good. 888 01:06:26,954 --> 01:06:31,078 - How about a pit stop? - Sorry. This is a one-way flight. 889 01:06:31,203 --> 01:06:33,120 There's a bathroom in the back. 890 01:06:33,203 --> 01:06:36,245 The latch is broken. Anybody could just come in. 891 01:06:36,328 --> 01:06:41,995 So what? You ain't got nothing the other Lucys haven't seen already. 892 01:06:42,161 --> 01:06:43,077 01:06:45,369 Please, would you stop screaming? 894 01:06:46,202 --> 01:06:47,285 Damn! 895 01:06:51,244 --> 01:06:52,660 Help me! 896 01:06:52,744 --> 01:06:55,243 For God's sake, help me! 897 01:07:08,117 --> 01:07:10,283 Oh, shit. 898 01:07:15,992 --> 01:07:19,157 Owen! Owen, what are you doing? 899 01:07:19,241 --> 01:07:21,199 It's a flat tire. Please, stay on the bus. 900 01:07:21,282 --> 01:07:24,782 - Well, you're turning it the wrong way. - I know what I'm doing. 901 01:07:24,907 --> 01:07:28,616 01:07:32,615 I think you're supposed to change the air in the tires every 12,000 miles. 903 01:07:32,740 --> 01:07:35,406 - I can fix it. - Give me that! 904 01:07:37,031 --> 01:07:39,198 Wait! That's the spare! 905 01:07:48,280 --> 01:07:49,780 We'll still catch it. 906 01:08:15,819 --> 01:08:18,486 Turn it around. Just turn it around. 907 01:08:18,569 --> 01:08:22,111 Please be careful. Wait, wait, wait. What is that? 908 01:08:24,361 --> 01:08:27,485 - It's a nickel. - Would you please put it in the bag? 909 01:08:45,067 --> 01:08:49,359 Why don't you check over there? Maybe it bounced. 910 01:08:51,816 --> 01:08:55,983 - I'm a dead man. - Don't worry. We will find the heart. 911 01:08:56,024 --> 01:09:00,108 I have lost my heart many times before. 912 01:09:03,857 --> 01:09:05,773 I make a joke... 913 01:09:05,857 --> 01:09:09,815 to help you forget how screwed you are. 914 01:09:09,898 --> 01:09:14,731 01:09:16,939 Oh, hello. A doggy. 916 01:09:17,022 --> 01:09:19,356 Hello. Hello. Hello there. 917 01:09:19,439 --> 01:09:21,689 Isn't he a good doggy? 918 01:09:21,772 --> 01:09:24,356 Come on. Come on. Fetch. Fetch it. 919 01:09:26,146 --> 01:09:29,105 Look at him go. 920 01:09:30,938 --> 01:09:33,605 - Here, boy! - Doggy! 921 01:09:33,688 --> 01:09:35,105 Good boy! 922 01:09:40,104 --> 01:09:41,687 - It really is a beautiful car. - Yeah. 923 01:09:41,812 --> 01:09:43,979 - Look at this mahogany. - Gorgeous. 924 01:09:44,062 --> 01:09:47,145 You just don't see that anymore, you know? 925 01:09:47,229 --> 01:09:50,311 - I wonder what this is. - Careful. That's a cigarette lighter. 926 01:09:50,394 --> 01:09:52,311 - No, I don't think they had those then. - Yes, they did. 927 01:09:53,103 --> 01:09:55,228 Oh, honey! Did you burn yourself? 928 01:09:55,269 --> 01:09:57,436 - Yeah. Oh, God! - Oh, I told you. 929 01:10:00,893 --> 01:10:02,893 Sorry. 930 01:10:02,977 --> 01:10:05,435 01:10:09,268 - He was pulling, then he was waving-- - Bev, Bev, not helping. 932 01:10:10,518 --> 01:10:12,434 - Hi. - Hi. 933 01:10:15,059 --> 01:10:18,184 I really like your dike. Bike. 934 01:10:20,434 --> 01:10:21,351 It's nice. 935 01:10:26,475 --> 01:10:29,475 Cut 'em off! Get in front! 936 01:10:30,225 --> 01:10:32,850 - Hey! What are you, nuts? - Get down! 937 01:10:32,933 --> 01:10:35,016 Kids, stay down! This thing won't go any faster! 938 01:10:35,100 --> 01:10:37,474 Stop it! The headlights! The headlight! 939 01:10:37,557 --> 01:10:42,182 - Oh, my God! - Are you insane? This is Hitler's car! 940 01:11:00,388 --> 01:11:03,680 Honey, go ask them for help. Tell them everything that happened. 941 01:11:03,763 --> 01:11:06,138 And ask them to call the police. 942 01:11:06,222 --> 01:11:08,138 And a tow truck. 943 01:11:52,468 --> 01:11:54,676 - Hello. - Hello. 944 01:11:54,759 --> 01:11:57,217 - Are you Harold? - Yes. 945 01:11:57,300 --> 01:11:59,758 01:12:02,842 Are you gonna invite me in, Harry? 947 01:12:02,925 --> 01:12:05,008 Or would you rather party out here in the hallway? 948 01:12:05,925 --> 01:12:07,092 Please. Come in. 949 01:12:11,299 --> 01:12:13,216 Not too shabby. 950 01:12:14,382 --> 01:12:17,091 - Where are you from, Harry? - From here. 951 01:12:17,174 --> 01:12:20,756 - Las Vegas. - A local boy makes good. 952 01:12:22,840 --> 01:12:26,631 So, Harry, what can I do for you? 953 01:12:27,715 --> 01:12:29,881 01:12:32,672 First we both get naked. 955 01:12:32,755 --> 01:12:37,214 - So far, so good. - Only we're wearing sailor hats. 956 01:12:38,422 --> 01:12:39,464 And then... 957 01:12:40,547 --> 01:12:43,629 we get into a Jacuzzi... 958 01:12:43,713 --> 01:12:45,963 filled with Pepto-Bismol. 959 01:12:46,796 --> 01:12:47,713 And... 960 01:12:48,796 --> 01:12:51,213 I clip your toenails... 961 01:12:51,296 --> 01:12:53,463 and you shave my buttocks. 962 01:12:54,879 --> 01:12:56,837 01:13:00,837 Okay, naked, Jacuzzi, Pepto-Bismol... 964 01:13:00,878 --> 01:13:03,837 toenails, shave my buttocks. 965 01:13:03,878 --> 01:13:05,503 How much would that cost? 966 01:13:05,587 --> 01:13:09,086 Geez, honey, you have quite an imagination. 967 01:13:10,044 --> 01:13:11,419 How much would it cost? 968 01:13:13,586 --> 01:13:16,086 Well, let's see. 969 01:13:16,169 --> 01:13:19,626 A party like that-- 970 01:13:19,710 --> 01:13:21,626 three thousand dollars. 971 01:13:21,710 --> 01:13:25,418 01:13:27,501 Carlton had 2,800. He's the closest. 973 01:13:48,083 --> 01:13:51,083 I think it's okay. What do you think? 974 01:13:51,124 --> 01:13:54,457 What about those little holes? 975 01:13:54,498 --> 01:13:57,332 Are they bite marks? 976 01:13:57,415 --> 01:14:01,373 That's-- That's how it was. I'm-- I'm pretty sure. 977 01:14:01,498 --> 01:14:03,332 What am I doing? 978 01:14:03,457 --> 01:14:05,872 I can't go to El Paso with this. 979 01:14:05,956 --> 01:14:08,997 01:14:12,039 The guy's gonna be alive for like two minutes and then-- 981 01:14:19,121 --> 01:14:22,455 - A drifter. - A drifter? 982 01:14:23,413 --> 01:14:26,496 We-- We find a drifter... 983 01:14:26,580 --> 01:14:28,537 kill him, cut out his heart. 984 01:14:28,620 --> 01:14:31,329 Nobody's gonna miss him, right? I mean, he's a drifter. 985 01:14:31,412 --> 01:14:33,454 He's an invisible man. It's a perfect plan. 986 01:14:33,537 --> 01:14:36,495 01:14:40,578 Where-- Where do I find a drifter? 988 01:14:46,619 --> 01:14:47,869 Enrico. 989 01:14:49,286 --> 01:14:52,993 - Where did you say you were from? - Me? I am from Napoli. 990 01:14:54,410 --> 01:14:57,660 And your family, they're back there? 991 01:14:57,743 --> 01:15:01,493 No. No, my papa, he is dead. 992 01:15:01,577 --> 01:15:06,492 And my mama. All gone. 993 01:15:06,534 --> 01:15:09,201 Any family? Kids? 994 01:15:11,909 --> 01:15:15,908 01:15:18,366 Why-- 996 01:15:18,450 --> 01:15:21,241 Why do you-- 997 01:15:23,991 --> 01:15:26,824 Look, a drifter. Let's kill him. 998 01:15:26,907 --> 01:15:28,824 Son of a-- Come back here! 999 01:15:51,363 --> 01:15:54,697 Whatever. Listen, sugar. You're not going anywhere today. 1000 01:15:54,738 --> 01:15:56,363 You got a crack in your radiator. 1001 01:15:56,447 --> 01:15:59,030 That's this big tank in front of this big engine. 1002 01:15:59,113 --> 01:16:02,154 01:16:04,529 - Albuquerque. - Okay, look. 1004 01:16:04,612 --> 01:16:06,612 We'll just have to patch it. A quick fix. 1005 01:16:06,654 --> 01:16:10,571 - Patch it? Patch it with what? - Sand and tire sealant. 1006 01:16:10,612 --> 01:16:14,320 You mix the two. It forms an adhesive, lasting a couple of hours. 1007 01:16:14,403 --> 01:16:16,320 We only have about 30 miles to go? 1008 01:16:16,403 --> 01:16:19,320 01:16:22,736 Hello! We're in the desert! 1010 01:16:28,735 --> 01:16:30,819 We should've bought a squirrel. 1011 01:16:38,151 --> 01:16:42,318 Mother of mercy! Where'd you come from? Car trouble? 1012 01:16:42,443 --> 01:16:46,359 Here. Sit down. You two look exhausted. 1013 01:16:46,443 --> 01:16:49,358 How long y'all been out there? Here. Have something to drink. 1014 01:16:49,442 --> 01:16:51,942 Ladies and gentlemen, members of the press-- 1015 01:16:52,025 --> 01:16:56,192 01:16:58,817 they're trying to break the land speed record. 1017 01:17:01,732 --> 01:17:05,441 A unique combination of automotive and aerodynamic innovation. 1018 01:17:05,524 --> 01:17:07,774 The vehicle, which we call Lightning ll... 1019 01:17:07,857 --> 01:17:09,566 represents three years of R and D... 1020 01:17:09,649 --> 01:17:13,065 which was conducted at the California Institute of Technology. 1021 01:17:13,106 --> 01:17:18,065 01:17:20,648 We believe that, aerodynamically... 1023 01:17:20,690 --> 01:17:23,397 this is the most perfect vehicle ever designed. 1024 01:17:23,480 --> 01:17:27,272 The entire vehicle weighs less than 1,850 pounds. 1025 01:17:27,355 --> 01:17:30,022 The body is a one-piece Kevlar composite. 1026 01:17:30,105 --> 01:17:32,230 The wheels are solid billet aluminum... 1027 01:17:32,314 --> 01:17:35,979 01:17:38,688 the same engines that are in the F-4 Phantom jet. 1029 01:17:38,771 --> 01:17:40,729 Are there any questions? 1030 01:17:40,771 --> 01:17:43,229 Mr. Calvert, what is the current land speed record? 1031 01:17:43,271 --> 01:17:45,313 That would be 742 miles per hour... 1032 01:17:45,438 --> 01:17:47,895 but we hope to have a new record today. 1033 01:17:48,020 --> 01:17:51,478 - Anyone else? - How do you start it? 1034 01:17:51,562 --> 01:17:53,645 01:17:56,020 A green lever to the left of the steering wheel in the cockpit... 1036 01:17:56,103 --> 01:17:59,186 engages the primary thruster, igniting the JE-- 1037 01:18:12,560 --> 01:18:14,518 740, 745-- 1038 01:18:14,560 --> 01:18:16,601 - That's a record. - They'll break the sound barrier. 1039 01:18:20,143 --> 01:18:23,475 Well, that's it. I still don't think she's gonna hold. 1040 01:18:23,559 --> 01:18:26,684 - What do we owe you? - Five hundred bucks. 1041 01:18:26,767 --> 01:18:30,142 01:18:33,224 No way. That's 20 bucks tops. 1043 01:18:33,308 --> 01:18:36,099 Okay, here's 40 dollars. That's double what it's worth, okay? 1044 01:18:36,183 --> 01:18:38,099 Come on, Nick. Let's go. 1045 01:18:39,683 --> 01:18:40,766 Hold it. 1046 01:18:43,099 --> 01:18:45,765 Another little tool no mechanic should be without. 1047 01:18:47,348 --> 01:18:51,473 Fine. Here's your $500. But you know what, Billy Ray? 1048 01:18:51,598 --> 01:18:53,515 01:18:55,515 This is so unchristian. 1050 01:18:55,598 --> 01:18:57,347 Unchristian? 1051 01:18:58,472 --> 01:19:01,889 Well, if the good Lord don't like the way I conduct business... 1052 01:19:01,972 --> 01:19:03,597 let him say something. 1053 01:19:03,681 --> 01:19:05,889 Let him give me a sign. 1054 01:19:05,972 --> 01:19:09,846 Oh, Lord, I'm here and I'm listening! 1055 01:19:09,930 --> 01:19:11,971 Hello! 1056 01:19:17,096 --> 01:19:21,054 - Mach one! - We did it! We did it! 1057 01:19:27,262 --> 01:19:30,179 Hey, everybody okay? You all right? Yeah? 1058 01:19:30,262 --> 01:19:33,844 - Randy, you okay? - There's no Ink Inc. 1059 01:19:33,928 --> 01:19:36,928 - What? - There's no job. 1060 01:19:38,594 --> 01:19:40,844 It's a race. We're racing. 1061 01:19:40,928 --> 01:19:43,093 Donald Sinclair put $2 million in a locker. 1062 01:19:43,177 --> 01:19:45,343 And I wanna get there first. 1063 01:19:45,427 --> 01:19:50,385 I do not want to work at Home Depot! 1064 01:20:21,340 --> 01:20:23,590 01:20:25,799 George, don't eat that. 1066 01:20:25,882 --> 01:20:29,298 Get back on the bus! Come on. Back on the bus. 1067 01:20:29,381 --> 01:20:31,298 Simon, put that down. 1068 01:20:31,423 --> 01:20:35,048 You too. Back on the bus. Come on, everyone! 1069 01:20:35,173 --> 01:20:38,548 We don't wanna miss dinner. It's macaroni night! 1070 01:20:42,088 --> 01:20:43,463 We came in the rocket car. 1071 01:20:43,547 --> 01:20:48,005 Oh, a rocket car. Let's hear all about that on the bus. 1072 01:20:48,088 --> 01:20:50,088 All right, so we can still win... 1073 01:20:50,172 --> 01:20:53,129 but we have to leave now, all right? 1074 01:20:53,212 --> 01:20:55,837 - So, come on. - Dad. 1075 01:20:55,879 --> 01:20:58,087 It's been a living hell. 1076 01:20:58,171 --> 01:21:01,921 Bev, it's-- it's $2 million. 1077 01:21:02,004 --> 01:21:05,211 That's a lifetime supply of hummus. 1078 01:21:12,920 --> 01:21:15,835 Okay. Okay. Yeah. 1079 01:21:15,919 --> 01:21:18,794 I've been selfish. I understand. 1080 01:21:18,877 --> 01:21:22,169 01:21:26,419 I'm sorry. I almost got us killed. 1082 01:21:31,001 --> 01:21:33,001 God! 1083 01:21:41,208 --> 01:21:44,750 - Hi, everybody. Miss me? - Hey! 1084 01:21:44,875 --> 01:21:48,458 To show there's no hard feelings, chocolate shakes all around. 1085 01:21:48,542 --> 01:21:51,499 - Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. 1086 01:21:51,582 --> 01:21:54,624 I'm a little disappointed, but I'm an adult. 1087 01:21:54,707 --> 01:21:57,249 01:22:00,999 We'll get that van fixed, go back to Vegas and see David Copperfield! 1089 01:22:01,041 --> 01:22:05,040 Yea! Okay, drink up, buddy! 1090 01:22:05,123 --> 01:22:06,831 Is it good? 1091 01:22:06,915 --> 01:22:08,873 Drink it up, honey. 1092 01:22:12,415 --> 01:22:14,955 Oh, don't feel bad. 1093 01:22:15,080 --> 01:22:17,539 - It's not your fault. - We'll tell the company. 1094 01:22:17,664 --> 01:22:20,080 We won't let them fire you. 1095 01:22:20,122 --> 01:22:22,622 - I'm no bus driver. - Don't say that. 1096 01:22:22,664 --> 01:22:25,871 No. I'm not. I'm not a bus driver. 1097 01:22:25,954 --> 01:22:28,746 Oh, you mustn't be so hard on yourself. 1098 01:22:28,829 --> 01:22:32,163 Hey, everybody, who's the world's greatest bus driver? 1099 01:22:39,328 --> 01:22:40,537 Listen. Listen. No, no! 1100 01:22:40,620 --> 01:22:44,703 No! No! Shut up, you crazy Lucy bitches! Shut up! 1101 01:22:47,037 --> 01:22:49,786 I am not a bus driver! 1102 01:22:49,869 --> 01:22:53,952 01:22:58,619 I needed a ride to New Mexico, so I stole this uniform! 1104 01:22:58,702 --> 01:23:02,535 See this jacket? This is not my jacket! 1105 01:23:02,618 --> 01:23:04,576 Remember Marty, the bus driver? 1106 01:23:05,451 --> 01:23:08,826 This is his shirt! I stole it! 1107 01:23:08,868 --> 01:23:11,285 And these pants, you think I'd wear these pants? 1108 01:23:11,368 --> 01:23:13,784 These aren't my pants! 1109 01:23:13,867 --> 01:23:16,534 01:23:23,117 I am not a bus driver. 1111 01:23:25,741 --> 01:23:28,616 You're not a real bus driver? 1112 01:23:28,699 --> 01:23:30,991 You lied to us! 1113 01:23:31,074 --> 01:23:33,574 He ruined our whole vacation! 1114 01:23:43,698 --> 01:23:47,531 Here they come. They're all within 50 miles. 1115 01:23:47,572 --> 01:23:50,239 It's the final lap. Mr. Grisham. 1116 01:23:50,322 --> 01:23:53,447 Now, the airport's back on-line, so I want you to take the Lear jet... 1117 01:23:53,572 --> 01:23:56,781 scoot on down to Silver City and report from the finish line. 1118 01:23:56,864 --> 01:23:59,655 Yes, sir. 1119 01:23:59,738 --> 01:24:00,863 Yes! 1120 01:24:23,361 --> 01:24:25,278 Let's go back to Vegas. 1121 01:24:27,278 --> 01:24:30,278 Bev, Bev, wake-- Come on. Wake up. Wake up. 1122 01:24:30,361 --> 01:24:33,278 Bev, wake up. Wake up. Third Reich's here. Come on. 1123 01:24:33,361 --> 01:24:35,277 Get down. You wanna have a nice life. 1124 01:24:35,360 --> 01:24:38,818 01:24:40,818 Not good. Not good. Think. 1126 01:24:44,443 --> 01:24:45,442 Hi, honey. 1127 01:24:46,567 --> 01:24:48,526 - They gonna be all right? - Yeah. 1128 01:24:48,567 --> 01:24:52,234 Friend, I don't think there's room. 1129 01:24:53,859 --> 01:24:55,817 This one's little. 1130 01:24:57,566 --> 01:25:00,733 - There it is. There it is! - Silver City. We're almost there. 1131 01:25:00,816 --> 01:25:03,150 Yeah! Go! 1132 01:26:31,225 --> 01:26:33,308 01:27:42,344 There were two guys in there. 1134 01:27:42,386 --> 01:27:44,344 - Where'd they go? - Hey! 1135 01:27:44,386 --> 01:27:46,011 Thanks for the truck, buddy! 1136 01:28:49,381 --> 01:28:51,546 - Yeah. - Silver City. 1137 01:28:51,630 --> 01:28:53,713 Next stop, Silver City. 1138 01:28:53,796 --> 01:28:57,296 Silver City? It is the finish line. 1139 01:28:57,380 --> 01:29:00,588 I made it. I made it! 1140 01:29:02,587 --> 01:29:06,712 The key. Where is the key? 1141 01:29:10,337 --> 01:29:12,920 01:29:15,961 - Excuse me. - I think I am touching it. 1143 01:29:16,003 --> 01:29:19,961 - Get away from him. - I can feel it. It's very small. 1144 01:29:20,044 --> 01:29:24,461 - I'm calling the conductor! - I have it! I got it! 1145 01:29:24,544 --> 01:29:27,793 Wait! Wait! Come back! Don't leave me! 1146 01:29:33,085 --> 01:29:35,668 Come on! Come on, baby! 1147 01:29:37,376 --> 01:29:39,042 Giddyap! 1148 01:29:43,126 --> 01:29:47,001 01:29:49,500 Just one mile. Come on! 1150 01:29:50,708 --> 01:29:52,666 Randy? 1151 01:29:53,708 --> 01:29:55,875 Hey, honey, how'd you sleep? 1152 01:30:03,832 --> 01:30:07,040 - Pass. Pass him. - I can't. We're too big. 1153 01:30:07,082 --> 01:30:11,124 There's Silver City. We're here. Move! 1154 01:30:13,748 --> 01:30:15,664 They stopped. 1155 01:30:18,623 --> 01:30:20,289 They're moving. Look. 1156 01:30:29,663 --> 01:30:31,580 Come on, Dad! Let's go! 1157 01:30:34,537 --> 01:30:35,621 01:30:39,662 Daisy, Daisy 1159 01:30:39,746 --> 01:30:43,204 Give meyouranswertrue 1160 01:30:43,246 --> 01:30:47,203 Daisy, Daisy 1161 01:30:54,578 --> 01:30:57,620 Hey! Hey! Stop the bus! Stop the bus! 1162 01:30:57,661 --> 01:31:02,119 - We gotta get off! - Ladies. You know the rules. 1163 01:31:02,160 --> 01:31:04,327 We're not crazy, lady. 1164 01:31:04,410 --> 01:31:06,327 We should've bought a squirrel. We didn't buy a squirrel. 1165 01:31:06,369 --> 01:31:08,994 01:31:12,243 Open the door, or I'm gonna crush you like a cockroach in the night. 1167 01:31:12,326 --> 01:31:14,826 Open the door! Tell him! Tell him! 1168 01:31:14,909 --> 01:31:16,826 - Open the door. - Thank you! 1169 01:31:45,656 --> 01:31:46,948 It's Pollini. 1170 01:31:47,073 --> 01:31:49,240 Enrico Pollini on a train. 1171 01:31:49,365 --> 01:31:53,406 - He just rolled into the station. - Well, what do you know? 1172 01:31:53,531 --> 01:31:55,448 01:31:57,614 You gotta love a long shot. 1174 01:32:22,153 --> 01:32:25,112 It's here. It's here. 1175 01:32:25,237 --> 01:32:28,112 - It's here. - Here he comes. 1176 01:32:28,195 --> 01:32:30,570 - It's you. - He's holding the key. 1177 01:32:32,611 --> 01:32:34,902 And he's going to the locker. 1178 01:32:36,527 --> 01:32:40,111 Mr. Pollini, well done, sir. And congratulations. 1179 01:32:40,152 --> 01:32:43,360 On behalf of Mr. Donald Sinclair, the Venetian Hotel and Casino-- 1180 01:32:49,485 --> 01:32:52,526 Mr. Grisham, is it over? 1181 01:32:59,400 --> 01:33:01,359 - Get out of the way! - Open it! 1182 01:33:08,774 --> 01:33:10,691 He's sleeping. 1183 01:33:30,814 --> 01:33:32,731 Did I win? 1184 01:33:33,856 --> 01:33:35,897 Vicky. You let go of this bag... 1185 01:33:35,981 --> 01:33:39,522 or I swear to God, I'll report you to the escort service. 1186 01:33:39,606 --> 01:33:42,105 Mr. Grisham, what's going on? 1187 01:33:42,188 --> 01:33:46,021 The hooker-- The hooker-- The hookeris taking the money. 1188 01:33:46,105 --> 01:33:49,813 - What hooker? - Vicky. From the hotel. 1189 01:33:49,855 --> 01:33:53,562 - Pepto-Bismol? - I told you to wait in the car. 1190 01:33:53,645 --> 01:33:56,229 - What the hell is she doing there? - I brought her. 1191 01:33:56,312 --> 01:33:59,895 I'm sorry, Mr. Sinclair. She said she liked me. 1192 01:34:00,020 --> 01:34:03,520 I'm beginning to think she was only interested in the money! 1193 01:34:08,269 --> 01:34:10,603 - Come with me. - I'll drive. 1194 01:34:24,852 --> 01:34:27,976 01:34:37,309 - The bus! The bus. - You wanna steal a bus? 1196 01:34:37,392 --> 01:34:40,683 - Yes, I do. - My God, what have I done? 1197 01:34:42,475 --> 01:34:45,058 Help! Somebody help me! 1198 01:34:47,475 --> 01:34:49,433 This thing's got a mind of its own. 1199 01:34:55,890 --> 01:34:58,349 - Finders keepers, pal. - That's mine. 1200 01:34:58,432 --> 01:35:00,682 I see it! I see it! Relax! 1201 01:35:13,639 --> 01:35:15,930 It means it's a scratch. Nobody wins. 1202 01:35:16,013 --> 01:35:19,763 01:35:22,888 Carla, call the airport. Tell them to get my other Lear ready. 1204 01:35:22,972 --> 01:35:25,971 Gordon, stay here and watch the board. Tell us where they're going. 1205 01:35:26,054 --> 01:35:30,012 Gentlemen, grab your drinks. We're going to Silver City. 1206 01:35:40,470 --> 01:35:42,386 - Is that it? - That's it. 1207 01:35:42,470 --> 01:35:44,678 Thank the pilot. Tell him to level off. 1208 01:35:46,136 --> 01:35:47,886 01:35:50,260 - It was me. - Well done! 1210 01:35:50,427 --> 01:35:53,260 - Congratulations. - Very good. 1211 01:35:57,219 --> 01:35:58,135 Keep going! 1212 01:35:59,302 --> 01:36:01,259 Come on! 1213 01:36:01,343 --> 01:36:03,884 There it is. It's coming down right there. 1214 01:36:20,300 --> 01:36:22,342 - Where is it? - There it is. 1215 01:36:22,425 --> 01:36:24,216 Go! 1216 01:36:27,257 --> 01:36:30,716 - Get it! Get it! - Grab that money! 1217 01:36:30,799 --> 01:36:32,757 01:36:52,922 Now, that is one hell of an entrance. 1219 01:36:53,005 --> 01:36:54,839 It's Smash Mouth! 1220 01:36:55,922 --> 01:36:58,671 What's going on over here? 1221 01:36:58,754 --> 01:37:00,754 - What's this? - Money. 1222 01:37:00,838 --> 01:37:03,004 Jesus, how much is this? 1223 01:37:03,088 --> 01:37:05,338 - Two million dollars. - Two-- 1224 01:37:05,421 --> 01:37:09,421 Two million-- Two million dollars, everybody! 1225 01:37:11,962 --> 01:37:14,087 Two million dollars! 1226 01:37:14,170 --> 01:37:17,128 01:37:21,045 and we decide to share all the money. 1228 01:37:22,044 --> 01:37:24,169 They're gonna share all the money, everybody! 1229 01:37:25,544 --> 01:37:27,044 Oh, man! 1230 01:37:28,086 --> 01:37:29,711 Get these guys some jackets. 1231 01:37:29,794 --> 01:37:32,252 Get these jack-- Get these jackets over here. 1232 01:37:33,918 --> 01:37:37,085 So what's the story, man? Are you guys some kind of organization? 1233 01:37:37,168 --> 01:37:41,043 01:37:44,126 They just met this morning, everybody! 1235 01:37:44,168 --> 01:37:45,667 Oh, my God! 1236 01:37:45,792 --> 01:37:48,750 I almost didn't come along, but then I met Tracy and-- 1237 01:37:48,834 --> 01:37:50,917 Well, great things happen all at once. 1238 01:37:51,000 --> 01:37:54,459 Oh, this is beautiful, baby. This is beautiful. 1239 01:37:54,542 --> 01:37:56,834 Great things happen, I don't know. 1240 01:37:57,958 --> 01:37:59,874 01:38:03,958 We're gonna check the tote board now and see where we're at. Okay? 1242 01:38:04,041 --> 01:38:07,541 Come on, baby. Let it roll. Come on, baby. 1243 01:38:17,207 --> 01:38:18,582 You don't understand. 1244 01:38:23,872 --> 01:38:28,581 Excuse me. We work for Feed the Earth. 1245 01:38:28,664 --> 01:38:30,497 These are some of our children. 1246 01:38:35,705 --> 01:38:39,538 I don't know who you people are or where you came from... 1247 01:38:39,580 --> 01:38:42,830 but God bless you. 1248 01:38:45,037 --> 01:38:45,954 Tonight... 1249 01:38:46,037 --> 01:38:48,579 you've given to these kids... 1250 01:38:48,704 --> 01:38:53,787 and their brothers and sisters all over the world more than money. 1251 01:38:53,912 --> 01:38:56,661 You've given them back their faith... 1252 01:38:56,744 --> 01:39:00,161 their faith in the goodness of people. 1253 01:39:07,743 --> 01:39:12,910 She said, "You are just like the 12 disciples." 1254 01:39:14,577 --> 01:39:16,202 01:39:20,742 Aw! 1256 01:39:22,242 --> 01:39:23,867 Thank you. 1257 01:40:11,863 --> 01:40:13,780 Forget it. 1258 01:40:13,863 --> 01:40:16,654 All these other disciples can do whatever they want with their share. 1259 01:40:16,737 --> 01:40:18,862 - But this money goes home with us. - What? 1260 01:40:18,904 --> 01:40:22,237 - Period. End of story. - Put the money in the bag, carrot. 1261 01:40:26,779 --> 01:40:29,736 You don't know me, man. 1262 01:40:29,861 --> 01:40:31,820 Come here. 1263 01:40:34,153 --> 01:40:36,111 01:40:40,319 I'm so proud of you. 1265 01:40:40,360 --> 01:40:43,402 Giving away all of your money? 1266 01:40:54,943 --> 01:40:56,359 Come on. 1267 01:41:05,108 --> 01:41:08,317 Mama is watching us from heaven right now. 1268 01:41:10,817 --> 01:41:12,858 What would she do? 1269 01:41:16,691 --> 01:41:20,399 It's for starving children, Duane. 1270 01:41:22,607 --> 01:41:24,566 Do it for Mom. 1271 01:41:49,564 --> 01:41:51,688 Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. 1272 01:41:51,771 --> 01:41:54,188 01:41:58,146 None of us would be here tonight if it wasn't for this man. 1274 01:41:58,229 --> 01:42:01,645 He is the man with the plan, Mr. Donald Sinclair. 1275 01:42:02,728 --> 01:42:03,645 What? 1276 01:42:03,728 --> 01:42:06,478 One of the wealthiest men in the world! 1277 01:42:08,062 --> 01:42:11,145 - Mr. Donald Sinclair! - You are the man. 1278 01:42:11,270 --> 01:42:14,769 Get a camera on him. There you go. Nice shot. There he is. 1279 01:42:16,227 --> 01:42:19,477 These men, they didn't have to be here tonight. 1280 01:42:19,519 --> 01:42:21,977 No, they could be off kicking back in the Riviera... 1281 01:42:22,019 --> 01:42:25,518 or in Vegas blowing their money on some meaningless idiotic bet. 1282 01:42:27,393 --> 01:42:29,310 They couldn't do that... 1283 01:42:29,393 --> 01:42:31,851 not when there were children going to bed hungry every night. 1284 01:42:31,893 --> 01:42:34,768 Isn't that right, fellas? 1285 01:42:34,851 --> 01:42:36,767 01:42:39,475 Mr. Donald Sinclair and his partners... 1287 01:42:39,559 --> 01:42:42,767 want you and the millions of people watching at home... 1288 01:42:42,850 --> 01:42:45,809 to know they plan to match whatever you raise tonight... 1289 01:42:45,892 --> 01:42:47,892 dollar for dollar! 1290 01:42:47,974 --> 01:42:49,724 - Dollar for dollar! - Dollar for dollar! 1291 01:42:53,058 --> 01:42:54,724 A matching fund, everybody! 1292 01:42:54,808 --> 01:42:57,224 Let's hit the phones out there and crank it up... 1293 01:42:57,308 --> 01:43:00,098 because we're gonna feed the whole world tonight! 1294 01:43:01,473 --> 01:43:03,890 Somebody once told me 1295 01:43:03,932 --> 01:43:06,432 The world is gonna roll me 1296 01:43:06,515 --> 01:43:10,307 I ain't the sharpest toolin the shed 1297 01:43:10,390 --> 01:43:12,806 And she was lookin' kind of dumb 1298 01:43:12,889 --> 01:43:14,889 With a finger and a thumb 1299 01:43:14,972 --> 01:43:20,139 In the shape of an "L" on her forehead 1300 01:43:20,264 --> 01:43:22,639 01:43:24,971 Fed to the rules and I hit the ground runnin' 1302 01:43:25,013 --> 01:43:27,013 Didn't make sense not to live for fun 1303 01:43:27,055 --> 01:43:29,513 Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb 1304 01:43:29,596 --> 01:43:31,013 So much to do, so much to see 1305 01:43:31,138 --> 01:43:33,805 So what's wrong with takin' the backstreets 1306 01:43:33,888 --> 01:43:35,720 You'll never know if you don't go 1307 01:43:35,804 --> 01:43:37,970 01:43:40,679 Hey, now, you're an all-star 1309 01:43:40,762 --> 01:43:42,720 Get your game on, go play 1310 01:43:42,804 --> 01:43:47,636 Hey, now, you're a rock star Get the show on, get paid 1311 01:43:47,719 --> 01:43:50,636 All that glitters is gold 1312 01:43:50,719 --> 01:43:54,761 Only shooting stars break the mold 1313 01:43:56,303 --> 01:43:58,010 It's a cool place and they say it gets colder 1314 01:43:58,093 --> 01:44:00,468 You're bundled up now Wait till you get older 1315 01:44:00,552 --> 01:44:02,427 But the meteor men beg to differ 1316 01:44:02,510 --> 01:44:04,260 Judgin' by the hole in the satellite picture 1317 01:44:04,343 --> 01:44:06,510 The ice we skate is gettin' pretty thin 1318 01:44:06,635 --> 01:44:09,010 The water's gettin' warm so you might as well swim 1319 01:44:09,052 --> 01:44:11,342 My world's on fire How about yours 1320 01:44:11,426 --> 01:44:14,342 That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored 1321 01:44:14,384 --> 01:44:18,342 01:44:22,758 Hey, now, you're a rock star Get the show on, get paid 1323 01:44:22,800 --> 01:44:26,050 All that glitters is gold 1324 01:44:26,133 --> 01:44:31,883 Only shooting stars break the mold 1325 01:44:35,090 --> 01:44:37,465 Go to the moon 1326 01:44:38,674 --> 01:44:41,715 Go to the moon 1327 01:44:43,424 --> 01:44:46,089 Go to the moon 1328 01:44:46,173 --> 01:44:49,714 Oh, yeah, go to the moon 1329 01:44:49,798 --> 01:44:53,298 01:44:57,880 Hey, now, you're a rock star Get the show on, get paid 1331 01:44:57,963 --> 01:45:01,255 All that glitters is gold 1332 01:45:01,297 --> 01:45:04,255 Only shooting stars 1333 01:45:04,297 --> 01:45:08,962 Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas 1334 01:45:09,004 --> 01:45:12,962 I need to get myself away from this place 1335 01:45:13,004 --> 01:45:14,587 I said yep, what a concept 1336 01:45:14,712 --> 01:45:17,129 01:45:21,878 And we all could use a little change 1338 01:45:21,961 --> 01:45:24,628 Well, the years start comin' and they don't stop comin' 1339 01:45:24,711 --> 01:45:26,086 Fed to the rules and I hit the ground runnin' 1340 01:45:26,128 --> 01:45:28,503 Didn't make sense not to live for fun 1341 01:45:28,586 --> 01:45:30,836 Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb 1342 01:45:30,919 --> 01:45:32,835 So much to do So much to see 1343 01:45:32,919 --> 01:45:35,085 01:45:36,585 You'll never know if you don't go 1345 01:45:36,627 --> 01:45:39,294 You'll never shine if you don't glow 1346 01:45:39,335 --> 01:45:43,084 Hey, now, you're an all-star Get your game on, go play 1347 01:45:43,168 --> 01:45:48,043 Hey, now, you're a rock star Get the show on, get paid 1348 01:45:48,126 --> 01:45:51,043 All that glitters is gold 1349 01:45:51,168 --> 01:45:56,292 Only shooting stars break the mold 1350 01:45:56,375 --> 01:45:59,917 01:46:06,916 Only shooting stars break the mold